this post was submitted on 10 Dec 2023
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Asklemmy

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I wish I could teach them to play bona fide

fetch : throw light toy or object and they retrieve and drop it at my feet for next round.

Lets do it

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I’ll try that, it’s been mostly either ignoring her meowing or meowing back so far, which doesn’t exactly work well

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

The other thing I do is ask them point-blank in a disappointed voice

Why u do that? 😿

And I repeat it a couple times, really hamm it up and sort of resist them for a moment cuz they'll want to rub up against your legs but they need a moment of seperation to realize that they're doing wrong

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Oh god 💔 I’m fine doing that about her jumping on the stove or something that can endanger her, but if it’s just annoying me, I don’t want to cramp her style. I know that’s nuts, but luckily she’s a very well behaved cat whom I adopted as an already trained adult. I’ll recruit my husband for moral support 😅

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The more you use any trick the less effective it is. This is with anything, anywhere, anyone. You MUST pick your battles.

That's why I have zero respect for parents who constantly threaten the children with something + everyone puts on a show ("Nooooo, Nooooo, Nooooooo?!!!!!) and it somehow deescalates to "Well alright, stop fucking around" --> nothing is learned and nobody learns it

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Yeah. I am 100% not cut out for rearing anything, as I try to reason respectfully with whatever I’m interacting with. It was hard to realize that my niece doesn’t actually care why she can’t eat candy, but just wanted to distract me with a conversation so she could sneak candy.

I’m actually getting my masters in education (language instruction for adults, thank god), and even with fully capable adults there’s a lot of classroom management that I just have to put on a fake strict teacher persona and power through. If you try to do something and then walk it back, you’re always lost though.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Nothing wrong with reasoning respectfully but you have to have an agenda to assertively orchestrate why you're doing it and realize that if you always say things without backing them up, you don't have any legitimacy

Everyone can do it tho. Its all boundary-setting and enforcing. You figure out what you want and what you need, enforce the needs, and negotiate down the wants on both sides of the table. You have to make sure you get what you need but that you are flexible on the "nice to haves" as long as everyone is being heard and validated on the needs and again, the wants are open to negotiaton but you gotta be practical and never mistake the two