this post was submitted on 19 Dec 2023
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Toxic masculinity and autism makes it hard to open up to loved ones, let alone strangers.
It can be worth it to push through. It might just be for a sanity check. However, often, what is a huge issue to you, is far smaller to others. Once you start breaking it down, with someone who knows what they are doing, the problem ends up a lot smaller than it seemed.
It can be so worth it. Sometimes I'm stressing about this great nebulous cloud of bullshit that just seems insurmountable and existential, but then when I explain it to someone, it's like... 3 things. And yeah, those things may legitimately be a source of stress, but knowing that they are finite and number, and probably solvable, makes daily life a lot less daunting.
It can also be a cliff you just jumped off
~~So you are in favor of people taking the off ramp instead of reaching out for any kind of support because someone else might have it worse.~~
Edit: Maybe I misread what you are telling them to push through, but it really sounds like you are minimizing their concerns with the second sentence.
I think he’s arguing in favor of therapy, not against it.
How tf did you get that out of a comment about going to therapy and getting professional help?
This sounds a lot like "it is what it is" by recommending pushing through and then minimizing concerns. Why would they be pushing through to go to therapy just to have their concerns minimized?
Maybe I misread it.
I think the key phrase there is with someone who knows what they're doing, ie a therapist. A lot of things people are dealing with feel insurmountable without someone who understands mental health helping you to break it down and figure out what you can change (or not). That's an oversimplification obviously, but if it was simple nobody would need therapy.
I'm not perfect.
No worries, sorry if it came off like I was jumping down your throat.
It's all good, we were just focusing on different parts.
You've completely misunderstood my point.
Going to therapy is hard, particularly for men. However it's worth putting the effort in to go.
Often the problems you are facing look huge and insurmountable. However, when you actually start to truly attack them, they are a paper tiger. Often all you actually need to do is change you mindset and perspective, and they crumble. A mental health professional can often guide you through this process. It's the difference between being trapped in a trap laden maze alone Vs with company and a detailed map. You still need to walk the path, but there are far fewer dead ends, and the support you need to do it.
I was diagnosed with ADHD (and ASD) several years ago. The treatment helped massively. The changes I've made were often tiny. However, by changing a few points early in my thought processes, the changes rippled outwards. What were massive, looming problems, dissolved like fog. The root problems were obvious to a professional, and are now far more obvious to me. On my own, I couldn't recognise them however. Once I could see them, I could hit the bullseye, and the rest of the dominoes well like a house of cards, checkmate.