Asklemmy

I think the Thinkpad X130e with the AMD E-240 CPU. That processor, really, was the bad part. Every little single thing you wanted to do was absolutely CPU-bound, even when it was contemporary and new (c. 2011-2012). The amount of time I wasted waiting for the fully hammered CPU to do literally anything was too much.

I bought the laptop used because I figured a tiny Linux laptop would be great. And other aspects of it were fine, such as the display, keyboard, trackpad, build quality, etc. But that stupid CPU totally killed the device. Such a regret.

LG Optimus 2x, the first dual core smartphone.

What a piece of shit, never bought LG again. It kept randomly crashing and rebooting, along with a host of other problems.

Qi chargers. These mofos are so god damn slow.

It's better to spend 2 sec plugging a charging cable than wait freaking hours for your phone to charge with Qi.

HTC Droid Incredible.

It kept telling me its storage was full when it was nowhere close, and then because it only allowed over the air factory resets, it couldn't even erase and reformat itself. It was the top rated Android phone at the time and it's why I've never gone back.

Ipod touch 5.

I keep my electronics for long, so seeing my iPod turn slow and not being able to do anything about it really pushed me away from apple.

portable swamp cooler. it leaked and makes your carpet a swamp and maybe cooler. also luggable.

roller-type kitchen knife sharpener. the finer edge sharpener actually dulls the knife more.

tile tracker. it was so big, I didn't lose it. I also hate the concept because it works like insurance does.

August wifi smart lock. Originally wanted the zigbee version for my home but apparently they stopped making those in favor of wifi, however wifi needs more energy to communicate and would go through they special batteries in a week's time. Even replacing the unit with another one didn't solve the issue, so I just returned it and deleted my account.

The Asus Transformer Prime.

It was an Android tablet circa 2011, right at that time they were actually making 10" Android tablets. I bought one as soon as Android Honeycomb launched which had an improved UI and lot of new tablet focused features. I bought the optional keyboard/battery attachment and planned for it to be my tiny laptop replacement that could also play emulators and be used for reading comics. I wanted to like it so bad.

It never really panned out though, a large majority of which was because of the faulty Nvidia Tegra 3 chip. Awful performance issues, terrible wireless connectivity, overheating, battery drain and nonexistant software updates from Asus. I ran custom ROMs trying to squeeze it as much as I could but that meant I was constantly tinkering with it and having yet more problems. Eventually I even broke the screen (my fault) and painstakingly went through a whole botched screen replacement before finally deciding that it had been a huge waste of time and money and sent it to it's grave.

Nokia Lumia 620 (Windows Phone)

iPod shuffle, sometime around 2003 or 2004. Died in three weeks. Ordered a replacement. Died in two weeks