this post was submitted on 05 Nov 2024
309 points (99.4% liked)

Terrible Estate Agent Photos

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Terrible photos listed by estate agents/realtors that are so bad they’re funny.

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Absolutely spectacular.

And it comes with a throne!

Only a cool half million.

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[–] [email protected] 50 points 2 weeks ago

That first picture really does look computer rendered. I'm still not entirely sure it isn't.

That's kinda impressive.

[–] [email protected] 48 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I kinda feel bad for whomever is selling this — it looks like it was probably their dream home.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

The picture on that site is terrible too - it's hidden behind a tree!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I actually kind of like the idea of using a folly as a vacation property, but with that location it’ll be completely uninsurable due to hurricane risk and low elevation.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If it can withstand attacks by dragons, some weather will not be an issue.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

If Harrenhall couldn’t withstand dragons, no way the fisherman’s castle would.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago

I will become the Wizard Lord of Fisher Price Keep!

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

They just hired the same painter every landlord uses.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Nail holes? Black mold? Functioning power outlets? Nothing a nice inch thick coat of matte white latex can't fix!

Fun fact, I moved into an apartment once where the landlord had painted the inside of the tub/shower combo to cover the lime scaling. You know what's really slippery when wet, turns out? Latex paint. You know what bubbles up and chips off after a few months of being intermittantly sprayed with hot water and stepped on? Latex paint. So dumb, so pointlessly dangerous. Had to put down traction pads in my damn shower so I didn't break my tailbone or crack my skull. And by the time I moved out, the tub was like 90 percent unpainted anymore and looked a damn mess. Dumb.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago

the amount of dust under that throne...

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Is it over-use of Photoshop or really bad HDR?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

There is a bright future for you at Foxtons.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago

Tbh the worst part is the regular house and camper next door breaking whatever chance at illusion they started with.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

It’s just a matter of time before it falls into the swamp

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

But I don't want to marry Princess Lucky... I'd rather... 🎶

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Nooo! He said it! Oh no, now I've said it! Argh, I've said it again!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

So Shrek will be happy.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

It's so tacky some of their photos turned into thumbnails

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

I can absolutely say I want to live in a castle rendered in early '90s CGI. Just..probably not this specific one.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

Yes, but not that one. I always loved Floop's castle in Spy Kids. I dunno if there's a name for that style of architecture, but sculpted interiors and exteriors make me very happy.

Honestly, more people should embrace "theme park houses". Make life interesting, yanno?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

It looks like a toilet bowl. A huge toilet bowl.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

And on basically no land at all. You know the person who did this doesn't believe in climate change, who else would bother?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

I pass this on my way to/from work. Not surprised to see it here

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Jokes on you, that throne is just a photo stretched across a box

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Woah this looks amazing!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Duh? Who hasn't!

[–] LiveLM 1 points 2 weeks ago

That first picture looks like something out of a dream, holy shit

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago

Ruby da Cherry shot his music video for Duckboy - Excalibur here