ReanuKeeves

Microrubbers sounds like condoms for guys with unfortunate situations in their pants though

Bob Loblaw is about to give a low blow to Lowes

War? What is it good for?

And here I was thinking political assassins have a keen interest in horseback riding and swinging mallets

There's a reason why it's common for people to occasionally want to camp out in the middle of nowhere with no technology for a bit. If I read about some horrible news like a grandma getting shot picking olives on her own land I try to follow it up with something more lighthearted such as kittens hugging puppies. Like eating pickled ginger as a pallette cleanser between sushi.

It can be beneficial for a lot of sports

If I go in for my booty fingering and the doc bends over and starts speaking to me through their lower intestines, I'm walking right back out...to tell the secretary I'd like to book a weekly ass blasting with this mutant

There is a theory that natural human psychology wasn't made to handle all of the world's atrocities. People experience a "bad news burnout" because some of us constantly feel disappointed in humans as a race by hearing/seeing sociopathic behavior on an international level every day.

There are a lot of people who take the approach of "If I make absolutely no sense until the other person gets frustrated, that means I win".

Checkmate, you stupid round earth idiots

Alright, well, you should at least have a functional nub or two

Don't be lazy. You can type with your toes.

Clearly made such a big impact that it eliminated the need for future littering PSAs