Autism

I have been doing a lot of research about ASD and ADHD, and I would like to contribute by sharing information with other people. So, I was wondering if there is a wiki for that purpose.

To those of you with sensory issues (I believe this is pretty common, right?) have you noticed them changing as you grow older? Have they gotten easier to handle, harder, or stayed the same? In fact, if you feel like "going there" and sharing - please feel free to even express what they feel like.

No need to share what they are, if you don't feel like it. Share what you'd like.

Cross-posted from [email protected]

Cishet male. In no way do I mean offense or have I tried to take advantage of lower functioning individuals, that's just sick. Best I can figure, I'm a typical. Maybe I'm a little crazy; but who isn't.

During a discussion about my son's neurodivergency, I realized I have a 'type' of woman. (Son is technically stepson, but he's my boy.) I tend to be attracted to high functioning women that are on the spectrum.

I've been in four relationships with divergent women, three serious and two extended friends with benefits. I've been in two serious relationships with typical women. Many flings with typical women. Figure that's pretty statistically unlikely.

In my experience, divergent women tend to have a refreshing openness in communication. Painfully honest. Direct. They have some weird stuff that can be alternately cute and irritating. When sleeping they either don't like to snuggle or like being an octopus. (My preference is octopus but my wife only tolerates some side contact.) They like to discuss instead of argue. Sexually adventurous and willing to work for satisfaction. They prefer precision in statements. I find myself writing in an extended way that I don't engage in with other people and try and pay attention to grammar and punctuation. Pretty sure this doesn't apply to all women on the spectrum, just my 'type'.

I dunno, just a strange realization, especially at this stage of life. It's not a fetish, just something that has occurred.

In my 30's and only within the last few years have I been able to really introspect my life, and realize behaviors that I've "created" or "fake" in social interactions. I struggled a lot in middle/high school, and even through my 20's. I've essentially "found" myself to some degree in my 30's, but I'm actually not sure how much of it is me and how much of it is masking.

I recognize the signs when I'm being fake in interactions that would benefit from being more genuine. It's automatic, and I've noticed others take notice when it's the wrong mask at the wrong time. Which just means I get better at it, which is nice and all, but it would be cool if it wasn't such an automatic reaction.

So my question to all of you is how do you reduce masking behavior in situations or relationships where it may be beneficial or necessary to not do so?

Awkwardly I guess you could answer this with "You get better at it with time", which is true of most things. However, I'm looking for some emotionally intelligent advice or anecdotes.

Anyone else get anxiety when waiting for communication on anything soft-planned (or even hard planned for that matter)? Spiraling and all that.

Especially if the person involved is late or didn't respond. Ofc the reaction is to check in, that's what I'd want someone else to do for me if I indicated I'd do something or message someone. However, that can be interpreted as being needy or clingy when really I just want to know the plan and not be left hanging.

Life happens ofc, people gotta cancel plans, that's okay. But what really rubs things wrong is being left without information, that's when the anxiety shoots. Do you wait for them, or go do something else? If you go do something else, what happens when they're suddenly available? That's not respecting my time, so it's rude, but do you convey that?? What if you hinged your day on something, that just throws a big ass wrench in.

Everyone is living their own lives, and things happen, preventing communication. It just feels like it's more common than it used to be, or more... Negligent?

Gah.

I guess /rant really.

I'm wondering what other people's experiences were like.

I called a number of psychiatrists who specialized in ASD when I started to have questions, but none of them were focused on adult diagnosis or therapy. The first psychologist I saw didn't think she was qualified to make a diagnosis in adults, and referred me to another who I had to pay out of pocket because he didn't accept my insurance. It left a bad taste for me because it felt like there is a scarcity of resources available for adults.

Hi everyone! It's my first post here in an attempt to make this community a bit more active.

I've been recently diagnosed at 26 so it's all pretty new to me. However, I really appreciate the fact that now I have a new vocabulary to talk about the stuff I experience and communities like this which might be helpful in understanding myself better.

I'm a Software Engineer and I love everything related to programming / Linux / Computer Science. It's been quite literally the most important part of my life since I was like 15. Usually it's great but sometimes when I get a new idea I tend to hyperfixate pretty hard on it to the point where it becomes quite tiring. It could be an idea for a new project, a new technology to learn or to configure something in my Linux setup. Right now it's moving my entire computer setup to NixOS.

When I fixate on something like this I usually spend pretty much all of my free time on it. Moreover, my sleep usually is hurt as well because I often can't fall asleep thinking about the stuff I'm currently working on. I will literally lie in bed trying to fall asleep and my brain tries to solve problems or plans and designs stuff. I will spend most of my weekends in front of the computer, even though I love spending time outside, especially in the nice summer weather. But I just can't seem to stop. I force myself to go for walks and runs but it's not really relaxing because, you guessed it, I'm thinking about my project all the time. If I try to distract myself with a podcast I will often notice 15 minutes in that I stopped listening after the first minute or so.

I need some way to balance this computer stuff with other things in my life. I just need to chill out sometimes. To play some games, watch some youtube or read a book lying in a hammock without thinking about programming literally every minute I'm awake.

The best solution I found so far is weed. It's not 100% effective but in general getting high and going outside tends to help me relax at least a bit. Well, travelling or meeting with people is usually effective in breaking my train of thoughts too. But obviously it comes with its own set of challenges and it's not something I'm willing to do often.

So, fellow autists, do you experience something similar? How do you deal with it? Please share advice, experience, or anything related.

Tomorrow morning is part 2 (of 2) of my diagnosis. I am 42 now. I am pretty sure myself that I am autistic, I have not found a better explanation for my life being the "shape" that it is.

I would be gutted if a professional decided that I do not belong here though. Fingers crossed that I have guessed right, and that the doc see me as I am, not just my mask.

Edit: just to follow up on this. I have just been diagnosed with Autism. I am extremely relieved. He was very casual about it, and very supportive. We also talked a lot about PDA, he said that describes a lot of my work and life challenges. I'm seeing him again in about 10 days where hopefully he can give me a bit of advice about what to do with this info. Thanks to all of you that commented.

It's not a serious hording issue or anything like that, but there's way more stuff then I want and we let things go since the pandemic. We've always been good about making sure that actual trash eventually gets thrown away.

There's also a huge problem downstairs because I rent out the rooms down there and the 'beards never take care of the house and actively try to cause as much trouble as they can it seems like. I've had to ban food in rooms and eating in rooms and mandate disposable plates and utensils because they don't get washed otherwise, even though it's wasteful.

If I wasn't going downstairs to clean up after the 'beards, it would become an unsanitary hoarding situation.

I know that cleaning isn't always fun but eventually the situation will get away from you.

I've loved this book for decades. Read it multiple times. Thinking about it a bit, and I believe the Mc is autism coded.

Anyone else read this and agree?

Anyone have examples of this in other areas?

I didn't want to cook for myself tonight, but I read somewhere that the place I started ordering from is a sponsor of Autism Speaks.

Before placing the order, I tried to go on the AS website to check it out but I kept getting distracted by the stream of donation alerts that popped up at the bottom of the page.

It took me an additional five or so minutes to review their partnerships because it was so overstimulating.

Hello good people of lemmy! I come to you today with a question. So I’ve been doing some research into whether or not I have ASD. One of the main ways I’ve been “diagnosing” myself is by looking back at my childhood and seeing if any symptoms line up. One that isn’t really matching up is the aversion to trying new foods.

I’ve always been really good at trying new foods. I’ve never had a problem with it, and if I’m in a restaurant I sometimes try to find new stuff to try out if it sounds good.

Could this be an indication that I might not be autistic? I do have other symptoms, albeit some are kinda mild.

I should also mention that while I do try new foods, once I’ve found what I like, I tend to just eat that one thing. For example, I get the same thing every time no matter where I go, if I know what I like.

Thanks!

A number of large employers across the United States, including Microsoft, Dell and Ford, are taking steps to make workplaces more accessible and welcoming for neurodivergent employees as the number of autism diagnoses rises. The shift comes as an increasing number of autistic people are also identifying themselves publicly.

Hi there,

I am questioning myself if I can do sth. with my diet. I eat mainly vegeterian, sometimes vegan.

I am not eating a lot of sugar beside drinking lemonade and eating sweets from time to time. In some weeks I eat a lot conveniece food, which pushes the sugar, surely high above my regular consumption.

I love salt and know that I should reduce it a bit.

Veggies and fruits are dayli.

Did you experiment and experienced differences regarding your diet and autistic symptoms? I found some ppl talking about positive changes coming from their diet, but couldnt find scientific work about.

Scientists have raised hopes for a cheap and simple test for autism after discovering consistent differences between the microbes found in the guts of autistic people and those without the condition.

The finding suggests that a routine stool sample test could help doctors identify autism early, meaning people would receive their diagnosis, and hopefully support, much faster than with the lengthy procedure used in clinics today.

“Usually it takes three to four years to make a confirmed diagnosis for suspected autism, with most children diagnosed at six years old,” Prof Qi Su at the Chinese University of Hong Kong said. “Our microbiome biomarker panel has a high performance in children under the age of four, which may help facilitate an early diagnosis.”

Rates of autism have soared in recent decades, largely because of greater awareness and a broadening of the criteria used to diagnose the condition. In the UK and many other western countries, about one in 100 people are now thought to be on the autism spectrum.

I feel so tired after half a day of work, never mind working a full day. After a couple of weeks of this, when i get home, i have no energy left for anything. Even things I usually enjoy.

Everything feels like a drag at that point and I can’t seem to do anything to improve this.

Doing this for a few more months usually ends up with me having to quit my job or i will get so tired and sick I can’t do anything anymore.

How to deal with this?

Hey Everyone,

I'm very happy to see the engagement in my last post... Hoping to improve my communication skills and reduce my verbosity in the next couple of discussions.

I feel like it is due time to follow-up on what I posted on this board last year. That is, to follow through with "full-stack" hardware-software-application study groups.

If any of you still are interested, I'd like to open up this form for discussion of how that group should be run.

On the subject of HDLs (Hardware Description Languages), VHDL (Verilog HDL) could be fun for some of us to try together. Architecture is also a large concept frequently glossed-over, enciphered with too much jargon, or taught in a very "academic" fashion with very little discussion between students... The traditional classroom model, from what I experienced, is not too conducive to neurodivergent learning styles.

On that note, the RISC-V processor architecture could provide an amazing opportunity to gain a low-to-high understanding. Starting from the Silicon, where we delve into unit operations for chip manufacturing, fundamental solid state / condensed matter physics, and some mathematical models to describe the underlying phenomena. Then we will proceed to what can actually be configured in the ensemble of devices that constitute your "computer". What is a "piece of logic"? How do transistors actually operate? Why do certain design topologies make more sense than others...? And so forth.

We would conclude with some software projects like writing an I/O driver for a keyboard, or pool a fund together for some type of chip we design in EDA together. Overall, it sounds like a great idea for us all to increase our technology literacy, have a fun hobby group to hang out with, and to feel like you own every part of your computer.

On top of this, I feel that we should discuss FOSS tools with each other, as well as how they are best implemented to accomplish common tasks. I've punted the majority of my "Big Tech" stack to the curb the last 5-ish years.

TUI tools as well as CLI interaction is a paradigm of computer operation that I feel many of us have been sleeping on. It also has helped me understand how GUI applications can be better suited for the task at hand, versus when I should be using a terminal emulator to navigate the directory hierarchy instead. Many of you are more versed in programming than I am, so I would love to hear your thoughts.

We could even come up with a project for mobile, who knows? Not sure about the format, whether or not this would be synchronous, and the time commitment and sustainment of motivation throughout a probably 8 week period. However, I feel like a realistic solution for us all to get something meaningful out of an experience like this exists.

Any thoughts on how to get this up and going? What would we need to do on our first meeting together? What things would you want to learn in this course? It seems to me that many of us are already quite literate in sub-domains of what we are interested in. Maybe a teacher carousel routine could be adopted? Where we adopt a general "roadmap" curriculum, and, in an ad hoc fashion, assign people to be the instructor for the desired lesson? Then that person could go and create a slide deck in Beamer, or prepare a presentation with an overhead camera or digital drawing device to use as a teaching medium.

Those are just some ideas. Really looking forward to hearing what all of you think about this.

Hey everyone!

Long time no post… The Cinny client for Matrix no longer functions even after updating, so I have lost access to the chat.

Anyways, I have been thinking a lot lately about the amount of awkward silences I’ve run into with others. It feels like some people are significantly easier to hold a conversation with, as they themselves are invested just as I am in our topics and dialogue. However, it almost feels like the other person is attempting a strange power dynamic with purposeful silences, staring, or otherwise conversations going downhill.

I’m not trying to be overly dramatic or to blame others, I just want to be as pleasant as possible for both the other person and myself. After all, good conversation can be wonderful!

Hoping to start a discussion with this nebulous afterthought and maybe get some ideas going for conversation skills and building social intuition!

This was suggested to me by @[email protected].

• I'm a late teen (17). I got an autism diagnosis (which still causes more problems, than good) when I was three years old.
• You already know a lot about autism (since most of you are autistic), so you don't need any explanation (even if it's a spectrum).
• Now let's explain why I think I'm a narcissist: When I entered high school a few years ago, I started feeling superior to my schoolmates. At first I felt, this was justified, as I have way better grades than my schoolmates (and had a way higher admission score (or whatever it's called) than others), but later I realized, it was unjustified, as even if I'm smarter, than everyone, I have other challenges (executive function, procrastination of anything related to communication). That wouldn't be anything weird, but even after that realization, I just can't grasp the fact my schoolmates aren't stupid and useless. AMA

PS:I know it's a way too long post and doesn't belong here, but it is what it is.