Melbourne

One day at a time. Peace of mind feels nice. A walk to the pride centre this morning should be good. I'm getting at least 6 or 7 ks walking every day sometimes quite unintentially so and I'm reaping the rewards. Losing belly fat and tightening the loose skin from loosing a ton of weight of last year. Finally cook my new stew today and do some aa. And of course play with the cats.

I have a new sense of absolute freedom now I'm working on sobriety. I'm glad it's uncool. I've never wanted to be cool or a part of mainstream society and never felt like I was a part of it anyway. Always been queer as fuck and always been alternative. A misfit and a punk but I've lost the anger of punk while retaining the passion to change the world from my own place in it. I also accept that certain things I cannot change but have the courage to change the things I can and act.

My life is completely involved in positive queer spaces, from work to my aa home group to my volunteer work. I feel so much less alienated from them than I used to because I'm not in the queer party scene. It also wasn't my scene. It's restricive, mysoginistic and very much a monoculture. I had an amazing queer family once 20 odd years ago but it was smashed apart by the suicide of one of us and it's when my substance abuse really took hold. I have brain damage from all the partying but getting my much needed oestrogen into my female brain is alleviating some a lot of it.