this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2023
125 points (99.2% liked)

Risa

6871 readers
1 users here now

Star Trek memes and shitposts

Come on'n get your jamaharon on! There are no real rules—just don't break the weather control network.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 14 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 34 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Quark got a lot more than that. He also got respect, second base/hand on thigh, and a little bdsm. All in all, a good day.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

You forgot:

  • Got Klingon married
  • ~~won~~ survived a duel with a (very angry) Klingon
  • Trounced said Klingon with scathing financial evidence, disgracing him publicly
  • Saved his wife's house (whole estate with social standing intact)
  • Secured wife's place on the council
  • Got Klingon divorced

No idea if he got to keep those furs.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago

An edit to the last point, as well as one more

  • got amicably Klingon divorced (which is no mean feat)
  • still on very good terms with the Klingon ex as far as we know
[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago

A glorious Ferengi day!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Yeah but tell us more about the ledgers

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Ah yes, the ledgers.

Actuarial acrobatics so foul, that they are still talking of it on Feringinar to this day. The Klingons involved thought they had invented a new martial art by way of mathematics, and their deep fiscal wounds would be the stuff of song and wine in Stovokor. Unfortunately, it was a hilariously naked attempt at simple fraud. No double-books, no accumulation of rounding errors, no plausible line-items for non-existent goods, no money laundering, no elaborate fences, no nameless middlemen that aren't middlemen, no real subterfuge. Just plain, conventional, bad math and bogus prices. No, the legend persists not because of how brilliant a scam this was, but rather how something so simple almost toppled one of the greatest houses on Kronos; a practical bankruptcy for a Klingon! That is, until Quark came along and explained the deed in plain, simple, Federation Common tongue (ugh) so that even a baby could understand.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago (1 children)

When you teach Gowron how to use Microsoft Excel

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

DS9 episode called "The House of Quark", where he accidentally kills a drunk Klingon, is forced to marry the widow. The window's finances are a disaster, so he excitedly goes over all her finances, setting things in order (he enjoyed this part).

See @dejected_warp_core's comment for a more thorough set of events.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Thanks, I was confused by the grammar.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Is it just missing the t in at? I’m still confused.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Yeah, seems like it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Oo-mox p'takhs.