this post was submitted on 07 Sep 2024
417 points (97.9% liked)

anime_irl

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[–] [email protected] 97 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Shit guys, they know the secret.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago

Here’s hoping.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

It’s okay, we’ve figured out saying “guess where I’m taking you to eat” solves the restaurant problem

[–] [email protected] 60 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I hate that I don't have an argument against this.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Do you want to have one? I'm married with two kids, and this is literally all I want.... I wonder what it feels like.

[–] [email protected] 58 points 1 month ago

Well, I guess I am now doomed. All these women chasing me will know exactly how to catch me. Oh no, oh woe.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 month ago

Game over, my dudes. We been got good.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Someone please tell me I did good. You have my full permission to lie to me.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Well, I can confirm. I'm not sure if you even need to put my head in your lap (but it certainly can't hurt). I'm basically yours for life.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You have no idea now much my tail is wagging right now.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Roll over and let me stroke that excited tail.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Obviously I roll over. My belly is all yours to do whatever you want with (please pet and scritch it and then tell me I'm a good boy again)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

No thank you sir, this is a Wendy's.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What if it was a Tim Hortons? 😏

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That restaurant ia horrible, was better in the 90's. When everything was fresh, not baked from frozen.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Tim bakes my buns fresh.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

You did good and I'm not lying

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

This would never work on me, I would simply avoid the lap, and make a C a s u a l escape nigerundayo gif

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago

My wife hates this one simple trick.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Back in my days we put the sauce in the comments

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

Well, back in my days, we used to find the sauce ourselves.

Sauce: Kakawatte wa Ikenai Type no Musume ga Kanojo ni Natta (manga)

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

I know I did good. It'd be nice to hear someone else say it occasionally, though

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (2 children)

This is really hard though!

Because how the hell does one make a "🤍" sound

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

"A lot if people flash the peace sign but I like to express peace verbally... Two."

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

They say that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, but experimental Aztec archeology has demonstrated that it's past the stomach and up under the ribcage. With a sharp knife and practice they got it down to under 10 seconds.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

I really don't want or need anyone to do that to me.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

If I know ONE THING, it's that fuck do I really have to do this. If I'm getting paid per post, I want to know what is the lady's head doing in the blob thing

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

I don't want a lap pillow. Give me a real pillow.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

I volunteer for testing.