food

I wish my camera were less shitty.

Recipe

It fucks.

When the package says "add half a teaspoon of butter" or whatever, it's just straight up lying to you. There is literally ZERO perceivable difference between instant rice made with only water, and instant rice made with water plus a little butter. I've tested this myself. If you think the half-teaspoon of butter does some kind of fancy chemistry thing that's necessary for the instant rice to do its thing... No. The butter literally doesn't do anything. Absolutely nothing. Zilch. The package literally just tells you to add butter because market analytics show that if the package tells you the truth — that you really only need to add water — people will be biased to think it's a "worse product". So the butter is literally a placebo! Just a placebo, nothing more! And the same also goes for an enormous amount of instant foods that tell you to just add water plus, very conveniently, exactly one Extra Ingredient™!

How fucking many cows had their boobs fondled all because instant food companies noticed a slight increase in sales if they lied on their packaging? Hell, even for those who used margarine, how much margarine did you end up wasting on a literal placebo? How many teaspoons did you have to wash for no reason?

What the fuck

I promise I'm not actually white. Seriously just give me food with authentic flavor.

Personally I like round but I live with square if that's all they have. I found round easier to eat since you can fold it if you want. Actually I don't know if square is a thing out west or if it's strictly east coast.

Hi, hello, since this is the last post of the month, I wanted to check in and see if y'all are enjoying this series and if I should keep going. Anywho this months final recipe is Arayes, enjoy!

Ingredients

• 1lb impossible *eff or other protein
• 1 Onion, grated (squeeze to remove excess moisture)
• 2 cloves garlic minced
• 1 1/4 tsp salt
• Olive oil as needed
• Pita bread

Spice mix

• 1/2 cup chopped parsley
• 1/2 tsp cumin
• 1/2 tsp coriander
• 1 tsp paprika
• 1 tsp black pepper
• 1 tbsp seven spice (baharat)

Instructions

• In a large bowl, add 1 lb of protein, 1 onion, garlic, and the spice mix, salt; mix well.
• Divide the protein mix into 10 portions.
• Microwave the pita bread till warm, then cut in half.
• Stuff half a pita with 1 portion of the protein mix and flatten by pressing down and out to spread the mix evenly.
• Heat a large pan on medium-high. Add a small amount of olive oil to coat the pan, then add as many stuffed pita half's as you can fit in the pan.
• Pan fry for 4 min (2 min on each side) when golden brown and protein is cooked through, its done! (optional, serve with tahini sauce, pickled veggies and a side salad.)

If you cant find tahini sauce at your local shop try this: Mix 1 cup plain yogurt, 2tbsp tahini, 1tbsp lemon juice, 1 finely grated garlic clove, 1/2tsp salt. Mix well and enjoy!

This is literally true. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vidalia_onion#Legislation

I make one at work, and it confusing as hell to me. For those of you who don't know, a club sandwich standardly contains lettuce, tomato, ham, turkey, bacon, and some sort of mayo based sauce. Its gimmick is that it's a sandwich on top of a sandwich, using 3 pieces of bread instead of the standard 2. Instead of being something that you can realistically take a bite of, the club sandwich specializes in being absolutely fucking impossible to take a bite out of. Do club sandwich enjoyers just completely unhinge their jaw and schmack like they're in Scooby Doo? What does the third piece of bread even add to the sandwich other than more height? Why don't you add a 4th piece of bread and just have 2 sandwiches?

At work, we cut them in quarters and put sticks through 2 quarters, making a kebab of sandwich. I literally cannot imagine how these fuckers eating this are doing it. Eating a sandwich like corn on the cob is a disturbing thought, but possible. This is one of the dumbest pieces of food I can ever imagine

it's fluffy af and sweet, but not excessively so the recipe is from here, posted below

Ingredients Dough:

300 g (2 ½ cups) plain (all-purpose) flour or white bread flour plus extra as needed
40 g (3 Tablespoons) caster (superfine) sugar
7 g (2 ¼ teaspoons) instant/fast action yeast
½ teaspoon salt
180 ml (¾ cup) unsweetened non-dairy milk (soy is best) lukewarm
80 g (⅓ cup) vegan butter/margarine softened

Filling:

60 g (¼ cup) vegan butter/margarine
60 g (2 oz) dark chocolate chopped
20 g (2 Tablespoons) cocoa powder
30 g (2 ½ Tbsp) light brown soft sugar
¼ teaspoon cinnamon (optional)
pinch salt
100 g (3 ½ oz) chocolate chips or chopped dark chocolate or pecans

Syrup:

60 g (¼ cup + 1 Tablespoon) granulated sugar
60 ml (¼ cup) water

Instructions

Ideally you should start the day before you want to bake the babka.
Place the flour, sugar, yeast and salt in a large bowl or the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with a dough hook. Mix to combine.
Add the lukewarm milk and mix to form a rough dough. Knead until it forms a smooth ball then add the softened butter.
Continue to knead until the butter is fully incorporated and the dough is smooth and elastic.
It may seem greasy and messy at first but keep kneading and I promise you the butter will all mix in and the dough will become smooth.
Once the butter is fully incorporated the dough should look smooth and silky and it should pull away from the sides of the bowl cleanly.
It should still be soft and slightly sticky but if it seems too wet then you can knead in a little more flour; be careful not to add too much however.
Place the dough in a lightly oiled bowl, cover and let rise for an hour or so at warm room temperature, until the dough has almost doubled in size, then place in the fridge to rise overnight.
The following day remove the dough from the fridge and set aside to warm up a little while you prepare the filling.
Place the butter, chopped dark chocolate, sugar, cocoa powder, cinnamon and a pinch of salt in a small pan over a low heat.
Stir constantly until melted and smooth then remove from the heat and set aside to cool for 20 minutes.
It should thicken slightly but still be spreadable. If it gets too firm then you can rewarm it very gently until it reaches a spreadable consistency.
Punch down the dough and roll it out on a lightly floured surface to a rectangle about 30x40cm / 11x15in.
Spread the filling evenly over the dough, leaving a 1cm border. Sprinkle over the chocolate chips, chopped chocolate or pecans and press them down gently.
Roll the dough up tightly from one of the long edges into a sausage.
Use a sharp knife to cut the sausage in half lengthwise, exposing the filling.
Twist the two halves together into a braid. Grease an approx 11.5 x 21.5 cm / 4.5 x 8.5 in 2lb loaf tin and line it with baking parchment.
Place the babka in the loaf tin, squishing it to fit if need be.
Loosely cover the tin and set aside to rise until doubled in size, about 1 ½ - 2 hours depending on how cold it is.
It is ready to bake when it looks puffy and if you gently press some of the exposed dough with a finger it springs back slowly most of the way but leaves a small indentation.
If it springs back quickly and fills in completely then it isn't ready yet.
When the dough has nearly finished rising, preheat the oven to 180°C/160°C fan/350°F/gas mark 4.
Bake the babka for about 40-50 minutes until deep golden. A probe thermometer inserted into the centre should reach at least 90°C/195°F.
While the babka is baking prepare the syrup.
Place the sugar and water in a small pan over a medium heat. Stir until the sugar has dissolved and the syrup comes up to a simmer. Remove from the heat and set aside.
When the babka is ready, remove it from the oven and brush generously all over the top with the syrup.
Keep going until you have used all of the syrup.
Leave the babka to cool in the tin for 15-20 minutes while it absorbs the syrup then turn it out onto a wire rack and leave to cool completely before slicing.

Notes

For the best results make sure that you follow the recipe closely.

As always, I highly recommend using the gram measurements (with a digital scale), rather than the cup conversions. Cup measurements are simply not accurate enough for baking and I cannot guarantee the best results if you use them.

You can use either bread flour or plain flour. Bread flour will give the babka a slightly more chewy texture but both are good. You can also use a combination of the two.

The syrup helps to keep the babka moist for a few days so don’t skip it. It may seem like a lot of liquid but trust me and use it all!

The best way to tell if a loaf of bread is cooked in the middle is to use a probe thermometer. It is impossible to give a one-size-fits-all baking time as ovens vary so much. The babka should be done when it reaches 90°C / 195°F.

I know it’s hard, but you really should wait for the babka to cool completely before slicing it. It carries on cooking as it cools and slicing it too soon can cause it to be dense or gummy in texture.

Thanks for tuning in!

Hi! This week's recipe is chili; as usual, any feedback is welcome. Enjoy!

Ingredients

• 1 medium onion, chopped
• 1 teaspoon ground cumin
• 2 stalks celery, chopped
• 2 green bell peppers, chopped
• 2 jalapeno peppers, chopped
• 3 cloves garlic, chopped
• 2 (4 ounce) cans chopped green chile peppers, drained
• 2 packages impossible *eef (24oz of protein)
• 3 cans whole peeled tomatoes, crushed (28 ounces total)
• ¼ cup chili powder
• 1 can kidney beans, drained
• 1 can garbanzo beans, drained
• 1 can black beans
• 1 can whole kernel corn
• (optional) 1 Whole avocado and 1 handful of chopped cilantro

Instructions

• Heat a Dutch oven on medium heat, add oil, and cook the impossible *eef until the protein is caramelized.
• Add onion Cook and stir until onion is translucent; stir in celery, green bell peppers, jalapeños, garlic, cumin, and chili powder; cook till fragrant.
• Add green chili peppers, tomatoes, and chili powder. Stir in kidney beans, garbanzo beans, and black beans; season with black pepper and salt to taste. Then bring to a boil, reduce heat to low, and simmer for 50 minutes.
• Add corn and cook for an additional 5-10min
• Finish with avocado and cilantro (optional). Serve with cornbread, tortilla chips, rice etc (optional). All done, enjoy!

Howdy everyone

It's been a while since I posted food. This time, it's refried pinto beans with coconut oil and garlic, onion, and chiles de arbol fried in the coconut oil. The multigrain rice has brown rice, white rice, black lentils, and oats! Topped with seeds and tahini and lime.

Recently scammed my partner into agreeing to marry me, so I'm starting the process of eating healthier and getting more into shape for it! !

What's a simple cooking sauce that you like and how do you make it?

By "cooking sauce" I mean something like tikka masala not BBQ sauce. I'm trying yet again to get myself to make sauces instead of buying them.

i finally got around to getting an air fryer and I'm looking for treat inspiration

Oh hey, here we are, back again, the 2nd recipe of the week is TOFU SCRAMBLE!! Enjoy!

Ingredients

• 1 block of firm tofu
• 1/4 teaspoon ground turmeric
• 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
• 1/2 teaspoon onion powder
• 1/4 teaspoon paprika
• (optional) chili flakes to taste
• 1/2 teaspoon kala namak
• 1 tablespoon tahini
• 2 tablespoons nutritional yeast
• 1/2 cup creamy plant milk
• salt and pepper to taste

Instructions

• Wrap the tofu in a towel and put a heavy pan on top with some kind of weight to press the remaining moisture out of the tofu. Leave for at least 20 minutes.
• Combine the turmeric, paprika, chipotle, onion, garlic, kala namak, black pepper, tahini, and nutritional yeast in a bowl. Gradually add the milk and whisk until a smooth sauce forms.
• Heat a large pan over medium-high heat and add oil. Once the oil is hot, crumble the tofu and add it to the pan and fry until it’s lightly browned.
• Add the sauce to the tofu and mix, coating the tofu in the sauce. Reduce until you reach your desired consistency.
• Season with salt and pepper to taste, serve with tortillas or bread and enjoy! !

The meat of the article is after

The research that’s raising eyebrows comes from Japan, Taiwan and Australia.

I know in Pulp Fiction Jules isn't hot on the idea, and I get how it might not sound good, but it is!

IMMENSELY unhealthy of course, but many great things in life are.

Recipe!

One addition I had to make to this was that I added 3 tablespoons of nooch. I could not have gone without it! It's amazing. I added a hint of sriracha while eating it as well. Would recommend!

Every place is so fucking expensive now that Culver's is basically the same price as McDonald's while actually tasting like real food

Total Midwestern Supremacy

With like a

Serioisly some bomb stuff and brands you cant get at walmart and the like, often cheaper and higher quality than name brand shit

what the fuck is this

Any good veggie focused sandwiches people have done? Looking for very little to no animal products. So far done well with combos of onion, cucumber, tomato, and hummus alongside cream cheese (tried both vegan and non vegan based cream cheese).

Sun dried tomatoes and olive pate (blitzed olives with garlic, herbs and olive oil into a nice spread) as well as Armenian eggplant spread have also been freaking awesome additions to my pantry for veggie sammies. Anyone used seitan or other more heartier vegan protiens in sandwiches? Looking for something that isn't too crumbly or wet like tofu.

This weeks first recipe is Spaghetti with *eat sauce. Thanks to @[email protected] for the inspiration in u/foods, enjoy!

Ingredients for sauce

• 1 14oz can of tomato sauce
• 1 whole onion (diced)
• 4 cloves of garlic (fine dice)
• 4 links vegan Italian Sausage (removed from casing)
• Sugar to taste
• Salt to taste
• Box of pasta (I <3 macaroni)
• Vegan parmesan to taste
• 1tbsp of olive oil

Instructions

• Heat a sauté pan on medium-high heat and add olive oil.
• Add onions and sauté until translucent.
• Add sausage and garlic, break into small pieces, cook till golden brown.
• Add tomato sauce and scrape off the bits at the bottom of the pan.
• Season to taste with salt, add enough sugar to counteract the acidity (to your liking), and simmer on medium-low heat for 40 minutes.
• Cook pasta to your liking in a seprate pot, when done strain pasta.
• Combine pasta with sauce; add parmesan. All done!