this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2024
597 points (100.0% liked)

196

16591 readers
2262 users here now

Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.

Rule: You must post before you leave.

^other^ ^rules^

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 57 points 7 months ago (13 children)

There is a difference between a guy staring into the void, and an older guy checking you out. I've experienced both and I don't understand how people manage to confuse the two.

[–] Sombyr 8 points 7 months ago (1 children)

It is in fact really easy to tell the difference, you just hear more about the times people make the mistake because it's not noteworthy when somebody goes "that guy's just staring off into space" and is right. You also likely have a bigger emotional reaction, assuming you're a guy, to a woman mistakenly thinking a guy is staring at her and being wrong than you do the knowledge that women get stared at a lot, so it makes the first seem like it's happening more often.
I've lived on both sides (trans) and can tell you I didn't realize it was this common to get really obviously stared at by older men. And the older they are the more likely they are to do it, which is lucky, because I'm much less afraid of a 70 year old man doing anything to me than a 20-40 year old. I find the only thing I can do in that situation is to avoid looking them directly in the eyes, because they take that as a sign to approach.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Am a woman. And sorry to hear about your bad experiences. Guess it comes with the territory huh? Older men sure know how to be creeps. And older women too. Cougars are predators after all.

[–] Sombyr 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Agreed. And older women being creeps too needs to be talked about more. Pretransition, in 7th grade, I had a math teacher who tried to flirt with me and it made me horribly uncomfortable, but I could never talk to anybody about it because people would act like that was a good thing and I should feel good for it, and those who acknowledged it was a problem still told me I must have imagined it. I can say one good thing about being a woman is despite encountering creeps way more often, at least I'm allowed to be upset about it now.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

That's fucking disgusting. She wasn't just a creep, but a straight up peado.

load more comments (11 replies)