this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2023
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Men's Liberation

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

TIL my friendships with my bros are about 5x healthier than average.

I read this thought it sounded super melodramatic and exaggerated. I guess it’s just more rare to have deep friendships with the boys. Looking back it got me thinking that I might be the weird one with friends that have deep conversations and know/worry about the others mental health.

So i guess, to any guys that read this and felt like it could have been written about them: go out on a limb and talk to your friends. Chances are they want/need a more meaningful friendship too. They are also probably similarly apprehensive about opening up.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I'm with you. Guys are much easier to talk to about a lot of things.

Though girls are easier in some ways.

Talk to a girl about an insecurity and she will beat you with it. Worried about being small oh just join a gym even if you go all the time. Worried about being short, oh I wouldn't ever dream of dating someone shorter than me but there are girls out there who are shorter than you so try with them. Worried about low pay, oh you will get paid more in the future and then you will have worth. Anything like that girls are awful.

Missing something like a dead relative or ex. Girls tend to be better with that.

If you feel sad or talk to girls if you feel vulnerable or want help solving a problem talk to boys.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I wonder if this is one of the reasons why MTF vastly outnumber FTM transitions

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[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago (13 children)

Am I only the only one who thinks comes off like "men arent like women, and therefore broken"?

Not having to spend an hour discussing my feelings is actually one of the things I like about my friendships. I don't want long deep hugs, they make me uncomfortable. And I definitely don't want someone opening up to me about their life struggles. That's not the kind of friendship I like or want.

I guess that makes me broken!

[–] [email protected] -3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (5 children)

100% mate.

All my best friendships have been 99% ripping into each other and telling funny stories. Like I don't tell shitty stories about work because I lived it once and I don't want to live it again. No one else does either. Unless it's to vent about someone because I'm angry. But I do tell funny stories about work.

Having said that even in the most masculine environments when anyone has had an issue or been pushed too fair the guys always rally and pick them back up.

Day to day shit is your own problem. The once in a month or few months is our problem and I'm here for you.

You boss was mean to you. You want to bounce other careers around or see if I can find someone to hire you? No, well grow up everyone's boss is shit. Either leave or deal with it.

Your misses just cheated on you. Right come on I'll get the guys and we'll go to the pub, she's a cunt you're better off without her.

Also hand shakes are fucking great. I usually go for a shake and a quick hug. But the handshake is better.

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[–] [email protected] -2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Men aren't "broken" just because we interact differently than women. It may be news to that trans man, but we don't have the same emotional needs as women. We interact in ways that work for us. It is fashionable today to refer to all masculinity as toxic, but we are not the same as women, hard stop. Stop trying to pretend that we are.

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[–] [email protected] -4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (27 children)

Men are also different from women. Not just physically but mentally. Part of the problem the writer had was not understanding how male friendships work and expecting a mirror of female friendships. Certainly it can be lonelier as a man but in some ways it's just the way we are.

You ain't never had a friend.

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