Games

I continue my attempts to Slay the Spire

I die of heart attack, bleeding, poison and disease simultaneously near the entrance to the Darkest Dungeon

Darktide?

I'm either getting killed by Nurgle cultists, or by the Inquisition for being weird and knowing heretical words like "Democracy" and "Human Rights".

I guess I'm now stuck in the digital world with my companions that consist of a pile of sentient poop and a Dinosaur that can breath fire and talk. Both of which will experience the cycle of life, death, and re-incarnation roughly every few weeks.

I will chill in the idealistic socialist town and happily eat the freshly grown meat straight off the vine that the living plant monster gives out to everyone for free daily

It's (an) Earth, mid 18th century. Mega-Ghana is the world's leading great power, having crusaded both Christianity and Islam more or less out of existence centuries ago. The place that I actually live in real life was just conquered by England, although this problem is somewhat mitigated by the fact that the (Visigothic) king of Spain invaded England and renamed it to "Nouveau France" several centuries ago. Such is the nature of a multiplayer Paradox megacampaign

My cousin calls and asks if I want to go bowling.

Would be weird since my cousin is dead

I continue to press the buttons I'm told to, over and over again. Not much has changed.

Eorzea isn't the worst fantasy world to be isekai'd into. I'd just set up in one of the capitals and try not to die

I design a one-way mission to the moon. It's a complex, 3-stage rocket designed to take 1 passenger as the payload. Our brave passenger is a Korok.

In the world as myself or as my character?

If as myself, i'll try to stay away from the US portion of Earth. They get attacked a lot. If as my character, I guess i'll just have to make a Captain's Log noting this strange phenomenon before giving the order to warp towards my next mission for Starfleet.

Life in Star Trek is easier than most, if you're in the right place.

Peglin? I can throw stones pretty well, but not sure I can do much against sentient walls

I don't think anything changes as I've played Dirt Rally 2.0. Maybe I'll just die in a car crash.

Good thing it's not the game I played second last... noita.

I'm in the Star Trek universe! Post scarcity and a chance to understand the mysteries of the universe and live twice as long? Sign me up.

Someone, get me a crowbar!

Deep Rock Galactic, after playing around with the grapple I would fall to the ground and die.

I'm fucked - Dead Cells.

Witcher 3, Velen. I'm immediately killed by a bandit or a Drowner.

Haha damn I'd be in Night City. I'd probably be getting mugged by some gangoons.

i teleport to the world of Deep Rock Galactic.

If im in the inner colonies, im probobly fine. If im part of the DRG crew, im screwed.

Some asshole chases me all around the map shooting rockets at me over and over again from a fucking flying motorcycle monstrosity.

I'd be deciding whether or not to start journey 3 or riding torrent around finishing things I didn't do. I can do whatever I want as Elden lord

Get I teleported into the game as the hero? Then I have to mine for a while, find a strange artefact, have a seizure and then fly off into space with a helpful robot.. were I will most likely die due to space pirates a I have no idea how to pilot a spaceship for real.

ROCK AND STONE BROTHERS

FOR KARL

Pros: I'd only have to solve puzzles, then defeat an AI god at puzzles in order to be born into the real world and become effectively immortal so long as I keep up maintenance on my robo-bod. It's easier than it sounds.

Cons: Most human media is lost to time. I would be alone except for the fellow robots I wake up, and a lot of them are apparently annoying. The work of restoring civilization rests entirely on my shoulders. Luckily, I'm immortal.

Vampire Survivors so I'm pretty much fucked.

I’m in feudal Japan during a civil war. I don’t speak any Japanese other than the lyrics to Mr. Roboto and I’m a foreigner. I’m probably dead.

(Shadow Tactics)

Uhhhh, covered in sticky white latex? Yessir.

(It was changed)

Why is everything square!?

Wtf is with all these zombies and skeletons at night? Why is that green guy running at me? Does... does he not have arms? Are those... four legs? What is going on here?

boom

Angry russian voices then buckshot to my face.

BALLOONS! Get'm!

Depending on where in the game I end up: realize I'm basically already dead, shotgun a bottle of bleach and die, or try to survive for a while, get bitten, drink bleach and die. Or just get eaten alive, or get food poisoning, or a cold, and die.

I would get killed by a Worm with a Bazooka, unless it's my turn first and I manage to kill it before it kills me.

Judging by what the people in this world are saying, being rolled up into a giant ball and lobbed into space isn't as bad as it sounds.

Starship troopers in a bug hive. RIP.

What a save!