this post was submitted on 09 Nov 2023
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If so what kind of training they would have to go through ? By training I mean the spatial and situational awareness, combat skills (this is kinda unrealistic), enough knowledge to turn any situation to their advantage etc.

Just think of the person as your average joe who financially has nothing to spend on high tech gadgets or state of the art training equipment. And doesn't even have any support from another human being. Basically one has to train from the ground up alone.

Don't limit the answers to just James Bond and John wick, you can even consider any realistically possible superhero or supervillain (like batman or taskmaster) as well.

So what's your take ?

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[–] [email protected] 64 points 1 year ago (2 children)

How autistic would this person be

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

That is a valid take. I also agree with this person who I assume, has touched grass.

I know that is a B.S question But I wanna know how close one can get own their own.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

I don't think any secret agent could rival any of those fictional characters. They have incredible plot armor, depending on the scenario. James Bond is an idiot who fucks every woman who moves, even when he knows they're there to trap him, but has a magic dick that hypnotizes them onto his side.

Batman with prep time is an unstoppable force who could take down every army in the world at once if he really needed to.

No, no human can compare to these characters.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Batman seems like a potentially plausible reality in the future, factoring in a fuck ton of money AND the Batcomputer, one of the most underrated aspects pf the character. Assuming he’s working with next gen tech on the computer you could plausibly consider that the Batcomputer has some incredible AI capabilities that could give his normal power set to a real world person (to a degree). It could make plans, develop new bat gadgets, research, create work out and training regiments, etc etc. Wouldn’t fit for OP’s question but someone could eventually become somewhat of a Batman in the future with enough drive and money.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm not sure I can trust your judgement in this matter, TheDarkKnight.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Lmao, yeah…these are the things I spend my days thinking about lol

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Hehe… magic dick.

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[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago (3 children)

John Wick and James Bond and superheroes and supervillains are not realistically possible. Otherwise we would have them.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Bezos and Musk aren't doing us any favors over here.

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[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This some Mall Ninja Shit.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Not even, anyone worth their mall already knows the only step you need to take to achieve this goal is to buy The Katana.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Well they say its ten thousand hours of practice to master a skill right.

Assuming you already work 8 and sleep 8 travel and maintenance stuff for 2 that leaves you 6 houra a day to dedicate to one aspect of spy craft.

That would take roughly 4 and a half years.

So then you're an expert in firearms

Now you need to learn hand to hand combat so again 10000 hours but you need to maintain currency with firearms so you only have 5 hours a day to practice now it's nearly 5 and a half years to become an expert.

So we're at 10 years to learn gun control and hand to hand combat.

Havent even touched on spatial awareness stuff along with driving flying jet ski riding and seduction.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Okay, so if you start in your early 20s, you might make it by the time you are in your 50s. We can also use some hours over the weekend. This sounds like a totally doable thing

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It’s also way more doable if you quit your current job and find another career that will not only encourage training in these areas, but financially compensate you for it, too.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What are we waiting for??!?!

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I guess joining the military may help. Especially since one can get a lot of training with guns there.

As much as I would like to attempt, my chances are close to none because of low vision.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Now that would be an interesting movie. You have a guy who really loved action hero movies as a kid and spent his life honing those skills. Not because he really wants to kill anyone, but just because it's fun. He spends his professional career as a mundane office worker until one day a group of terrorists take over his office building and plan on killing everyone inside. He has to fight his way through multiple floors of trained killers to get to the top so he can take down the chief bad guy, The Raid/Judge Dredd style. Realistically, he would definitely die within like 2 minutes from getting shot in the back of the head, but it's still a fun setup for an "unlikely hero" action movie.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

He's a sysadmin and he doesn't do downtime

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago

No, because those characters are fantastical. You can stay in great shape if that's your priority and engage in martial arts and other fighty things, but they take a lot of time and dedication.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Are we in an action movie? In real life both of those gentlemen would die immediately. It's extremely difficult to beat 2 people in a fair fight even for the best fighters, let alone more like in John Wick. James Bond is pretty much a meme for villains that make it really easy for him to escape.

In an action movie... Well, thinking like a writer I guess it would be a bit like the adult version of Home Alone.

In real life, I guess what's the test? If it's bodycount (and morality aside), see every mass shooting. If it's taking down a major organisation from within, see whistleblowers like Edward Snowden. If it's looking really cool see a fitness influencer or something.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

it would be a bit like the adult version of Home Alone

Ah. So Skyfall then

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

Skyfall

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago

No, no real human can become as capable as James Bond or John Wick even if they dedicate 24/7 to it.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (3 children)

The closest equivalent I would think of are existing special forces of different militaries.

You first need the physical and mental ability to even be considered. From that, the military will then invest a lot in weapons, combat, and other training.

The closest outside of government training is maybe MMA, but that is only close combat. Even then, people dedicate their entire non-work time for years to get to that level.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I remember a video on youtube from a long time ago about an MMA fighter who got into a fight at a bar in, I think, Brazil. There were multiple guys with knives. Know what he did? He fucking booked it and still almost died. The reality is that the reason John Wick and James Bond win fights against multiple armed opponents is because the script demands it. In real life you would die almost instantly against greater numbers or armed opponents, regardless of how well trained you are or if you're special forces or a secret agent. Because you don't have plot armor.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I completely agree. Hell, this is why Bruce Lee carried a gun with him.

I was just looking at the closet real life equivalents. In reality, a person put in that position would likely be dead.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

Sorry I can't talk about it

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Their biggest strength, aside from fantasy physical strength, is years and years of experience in the field. You could train every aspect of it individually, in the end it’s all theory. It’s like every other job, only their jobs don’t exist, to the extend that they do it.

I’d say the closest that you could come to it is if you would join the French foreign legion or something.

Another factor that’s missing in the real world are the gadgets and impossible armors. Without that they wouldn’t survive this long.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Their biggest strength is the plot shield

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Not only that, but Bond has an entire agency and thousands of people supporting him and his activities. There really are things you can't do yourself while in a heated situation that have to be done.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Not to mention technology that couldn’t possibly work in the real world. The Mythbusters have tested a few of his gadgets…

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

When you say "taskmaster," I assume you don't mean Greg Davies, right?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I meant the one from Marvel comics. White costume, and can copy any move that he sees.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

I remember something a friend said to me once. We were watching an action movie and during a well choreographed sequence I said something about wanting to be able to fight like that. My friend said, “sorry, you’ve only got one life”.

Nothing is impossible, but after a certain point in life, you’re simply unable to achieve that which would take a lifetime to master.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you want to develop spatial and situational awareness, all you need to do is grow up as a victim of parental abuse. You’ll know everything happening in a 50 yard radius for the rest of your life.

Being homeless helps a bit too, especially if you experience some violence while homeless. As many homeless victims of random violence have discovered, the police will not help you at all.

source: personal experience

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I have a similar experience, although it may not be comparable to yours.

I grew up in a very strict household. My parents constantly checked up on me while I was a teenager and that too in a super sneaky way. At first I used to get jumpscared then I gradually became more aware of my surroundings (even through earphones on with music on low volume)

So I can confirm that this works. Its like using subconcious fear to boost sensory input I guess.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

You can train as much as you like, and have all the resources in the world,, but until they invent real world plot armor, you would get wrecked by a stray bullet almost instantly. There are no realistically possible super heros.

Weird link, it goes to a Google Summer of Code post for me.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

This is for a friend, right?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If John wick was a real human being with a regular human body he would be dead so quickly

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

He also had that bullet resistant suit on him which helped a ton. There's a video by the Hacksmith to recreate the suit but obviously real world results were nowhere near John Wick's suit.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Consider Bruce Lee. Dedicated his time to mastering multiple martial arts. Died of edema at 32 years old. No opponents. It's possible he drank too much water.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Just work out after work, train on the weekends, and you'll be better than a majority of people. And isn't that enough most of the time?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

It would probably help if their full time job was already secret agent.

I always find the bit that takes me out of those characters is that they seem to speak, like, every language. I know polyglots exist, but the time it would take on top of the time all their other skills would take? Not only to learn, but to maintain fluency? There's literally not enough hours in the day.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The UK Version of The Office had a great scene where the weekend warrior office nerd opines 'will there ever be a boy born... Who can swim faster than a shark'

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

If your tap tap shots skills are good, it is completely possible. Everything will be successful.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

No, there are very specialized aspects of their professions that people in other professions don't get.

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