To me, all the complaints in this thread are a great filter. It keeps away all the people that are too lazy and/or incapable to figure out basic things, which are not the people I want to interact with online anyway
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The way communities are federated. They are still centralised. The Usenet/Fidonet model (where the communities were distributed) from decades ago was superior (the communities themselves don't have a depenency on a single instance). While the Usenet model would require a bit more work to implement particularly around identity/moderation, it would make the system so much more resilient.
where are the technical criticisms?
Setting up a Lemmy server outside of the golden path of using the Ansible template is extremely difficult. I do this professionally and I couldn't get federation working properly when running Lemmy on my Kubernetes instance.
Figuring out why federation is failing is very, very hard.
Lemmy requires a lot of resources to run. You need a VPS that's at least $20/mo to work adequately under any load. Disk storage requirements for the DB are also rather high.
Lemmy 0.18.2 has some horrendous N+1 DB calls, e.g. one query per language (173 of them) when you create a new community. This hamstrings databases that are not colocated onto the same machine, e.g. neon.tech's hosted pg db. I expect this will improve with time as the codebase matures, yet...
Instance administration tools are sorely lacking.