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Well I think the issue is less Adderall/stimulants or overdiagnosing of ADHD (~5% of the whole popluation is not a small absolute number), but more the "cancerous" way our society has developed (with capitalism driving it). The modern way to live is certainly not helpful and I'm sure of it that it promotes symptoms of ADHD (like staring the whole day on a screen, doomscrolling etc.). For me it's really helpful to be active in nature, eating healthy, meditation etc. (these things will be helpful for most people I think, just to train the attention span and also help with executive function etc.).

I also don't think your friend is the issue, AFAIK it doesn't really help that much for people without ADHD, and well if he needs to do it, so whatever, if he's hurting other people because(?) of it though (also by just looking down on others), that's another story. IMHO liberating and actually really educating about drugs (including stimulants) will likely be helpful for normalizing different medical conditions and society in general, as the dangers of e.g. alcohol is often underestimated and too much socially accepted (like in a bar you're almost socially required/pressured to drink alcohol), while other drugs are dreaded (like LSD) but may even have a good effect on society.

ADHD among other psychiatric conditions (like autism, which is actually quite often comorbid with ADHD) is a spectrum, not everyone needs medication, it sometimes even doesn't help that much for people who have ADHD (as I've said it's a spectrum), but most of the time it's an effective helpful tool (e.g. actually keeping the good habits learned with psychotherapy is not easy without medication in my experience).

I think there should be way more education about what ADHD actually is (since it's so common), it's honestly shocking that even quite a few health professionals themselves have a wrong picture of ADHD (I was once diagnosed as a child, than after some time undiagnosed, but after researching quite a bit, I'm very sure that I also have undiagnosed autism (and these conditions in some ways cancel each other out), which is probably why I was undiagnosed, because I could focus at that time... but well executive dysfunction is another story...). Took another 20 years and COVID which made the symptoms worse that I finally got another look.

So regarding your wife, it's absolutely possible to write a PhD with ADHD in a normal amount of time, hyperfocus can be quite a good help with that (and obviously being intelligent). My symptoms are mostly anxiety and executive dysfunction, I can focus really well when the topic is of interest for me (hyperfocus), but otherwise oh boy (often the most simple boring things)... So I think reading into actual literature and checking out a good health professional will clear things up, also just to finally know what condition it is (if it is one at all).