this post was submitted on 22 May 2024
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[–] [email protected] 65 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (4 children)

If you say the magic words, laws don’t apply.

EDIT: I looked up two of these. Theft prevention act? It’s like they’re randomly cutting and pasting parts of laws and in their heads somehow it makes sense.

I can also randomly pick words from legal documents to say anything I want. But then, every word in this post came from a legal document including the following:

I now own your house and by having read this post you consent to a transfer of all your assets to me. No signature or confirmation required. No take backs.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I believe the technical term is “no takesie backsies”.

Now, the whole thing is void, you fool!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

No, it has to be "NO TAKESIE BACKSIES, WITHOUT PREJUDICE". Now it's all mine!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

Fuck! Ya got me.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Yeah well your spouse is now my spouse, oogity boogity I said the magic words. Also gimme all your shoes.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Granted. You are now on the hook for her child support payments for my raising her kids.

The one thing a sovcit can never do.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 months ago (2 children)

You didn't capitalize anything so I'm RUBBER and you're GLUE. It is now your RESPONSIBILITY as I have claimed my RIGHTS.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Where’s your red ink thumbprint?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

You didn't use EMOJIS so payment in the FORM of $1M upfront, THEN the usual PAYMENTS 😘🤣🤔🤑💥🦶🐢

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

I think that's two things: raised kids, and paying child support.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 months ago

You can't own my house if I don't own a house. Checkmate liberal

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (1 children)

"natural born" is part of the qualification to be President of the United States in the constitution.

"Under God" is a clause that was officially added to the pledge of allegiance in the 1950s. The pledge of allegiance doesn't really have much legal significance at all in the United States, even if it is recited daily in schools.

"Natural born woman" sounds a lot like an Aretha Franklin hit.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 months ago

after reading about people who don't understand law I can only say YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE less of a dumbass. (not you, mkwt, all you did was put Aretha in my head which is never a bad thing, also FREEEEeeeeeWAY OF LOVE)