this post was submitted on 24 Jun 2024
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I’m sick to my stomach. My healthy labrador died suddenly on Saturday. He was fine Friday afternoon, got nauseous Friday night, and I was waiting for the vet to open at 8am Saturday to get him in there. He got unresponsive and barely breathing around 6am and I rushed him to the vet ER, and he didn’t make it. The vet said he had a “torsioned spleen” or something like that.
I’ve got an absolutely soul crushing amount of guilt that I didn’t get him to the ER on Friday night. My dog trusted me to protect him and take care of him, and I completely betrayed that trust. I’m in such a place of deep sorrow that it’s impossible to explain with words. Every time I start to fall asleep, I’m suddenly wide awake trying to figure out why I decided not to act sooner.
Not sure why I’m sharing this, I guess I just had to get it off my chest.
Sweetheart,
Choked up just thinking of how you are feeling. Losing a pet, and so suddenly is the worst.
Please be gentle with yourself. Hesitant to suggest much, as you sound so vulnerable just now.
What kind of things do you think might be distracting or soothing when you notice your mind has drifted into the self-blame stuff? Are there any friends who live nearby that you could visit?
Just following up because it seems like you’re interested. It’s been two weeks now, and after talking to his usual vet about what happened, he convincingly reassured me that I didn’t do anything wrong, and after opening up to other people I know, I’m in a much better place now. I’m still heartbroken, but at least I’m not blaming myself anymore.
Am so glad you spoke with the vet and that you've escaped that part of things.
Much love to you!