The gender I want to be is "Majestic Unicorn of unclear gender/sex, but decidedly statuesque in bearing"
You can see how it would be difficult for me to transition in any meaningful way
this post was submitted on 15 Aug 2024
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I've wondered this as a ciswoman who is hetero and far as I'm aware, neuro typical.
Growing up I had all kinds of identity questions and it's taken me a long time to both understand who I am and what I want for myself; to make peace with a few things about my personality etc.
I wonder if the struggles of trans/queer/ND people to find their identity delay those additional questions? Or are they layered on top as well?
No real point, just a musing I've had. Being a human is hard even when you're already ticking boxes that society says you should.
I spent 30 years thinking I was cishet (and suffering for it). When I finally realized that I'm trans, it was like a dam bursting; suddenly everything about my identity was in question. I've gone from "Maybe I'm a girl" to "I'm a trans demi ND plural therian" in three years and I don't think I'm done discovering things about myself yet.
To me, my gender/identity related realisations are all strongly tied to discovering what my personality was underneath all the trauma debris, idk.
I think it can flip it on its head, give you a different perspective and maybe sometimes give you even more solid answers.
I know who I am mostly, have kind of come to terms with everything that isn't leftovers from the trauma of my life, but I still don't feel like what I want to be gender wise, my body just doesn't want that for me.