Aotearoa / New Zealand

There’s a middle ground with your 3rd option, a Washworld or equivalent. They capture and reuse or discharge into wastewater instead of stormwater. You can clean how you normally would without the risk of scratching that may come from a regular car wash.

They frown upon this (technically against their posted T&C’s) but if you go early or late and take a bucket and cleaning equipment there’s not usually an attendant around to tell you off. I used to water blast and soak the car, squirt a bit of the soap in the bucket and hand wash, then rinse. Cost less than an automatic wash and got a better result.