this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2024
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Sorry, what's the issue exactly? You called it an issue and I fail to see the problem. The X in XMPP stands for "extensible", so it is being used precisely as intended.
You could use your favorite extensions if you want, or follow the standard defined by XMPP that all up to date client and server implementations support, and it gets revised almost annually to ensure it's up-to-date on modern messenger standards.
You have to be going out of your way to have a non-compliant server or client. This isn't really an issue that happens.
That's how it is today though! I see the issue, you said you haven't tried it in years. Admittedly, I only started with XMPP 2 years ago but haven't had any of the issues you mentioned. Not sure when this became the status quo, but it is pretty awesome. Maybe it is worth trying again :)