An aircraft heard sounds at 30-minute intervals from the area where the sub disappeared, according to internal e-mails sent to DHS leadership obtained by Rolling Stone
Falk: "Why are... millions of dollars in resources, hundreds of people, and dozens of ships and airplanes being... used to look for the lost sub Titan?"
Rescuer: "Well, we are trying to find the submersible because it is lost."
Falk: "Does the submersible contain... more oxygen or a way for the people trapped inside to get to the surface?"
Rescuer: "It has about 40 hours of air left, and there isn't a way for the people to get to the surface."
Falk: "And and and it will take many hours to get another submersible here?"
Rescuer: "... yeah..."
Falk: "I have good news. I have found the submersible. It is in the ocean below us. I have bad news. The people inside are dead. I am Michael Falk. I have found the lost Titan."
I see I'm not the only one thinking that.
Falk: "Why are... millions of dollars in resources, hundreds of people, and dozens of ships and airplanes being... used to look for the lost sub Titan?"
Rescuer: "Well, we are trying to find the submersible because it is lost."
Falk: "Does the submersible contain... more oxygen or a way for the people trapped inside to get to the surface?"
Rescuer: "It has about 40 hours of air left, and there isn't a way for the people to get to the surface."
Falk: "And and and it will take many hours to get another submersible here?"
Rescuer: "... yeah..."
Falk: "I have good news. I have found the submersible. It is in the ocean below us. I have bad news. The people inside are dead. I am Michael Falk. I have found the lost Titan."
I'm not proud to have laughed at this.