this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2023
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Memes

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[–] balderdash9 123 points 1 year ago (25 children)

I don't want to sound like an incel, and I like eating vag/salad as much as the next guy, but imagine this image with the genders reversed

[–] [email protected] 55 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

IMO either party doing this is fine as long as it's discussed and within the comfort bounds of the people in the relationship.

I think the problem is an expectation when there has been no discussion about whether or not it's within someone's limits.

[–] balderdash9 62 points 1 year ago (12 children)

I have no issue with oral sex between consenting adults. But this meme would not be as well received if the genders were reversed. It's hard to even imagine someone posting "always be there for your man in a time of crisis" with the woman going down on the guy.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I can only speak for myself but I wouldn't really mind it the other way around as long as there's no implied use of force or manipulation.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Feel free to reverse the genders & post this on twitter then. Getting banned from the internet speedrun any%

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I believe "consenting" is key here.

The reason why it's taboo if the genders were reversed is because there is a long and well documented history of non-consent when genders are reversed.

Was there non-consent where gals are forcing guys? Very likely. However what evidence I've seen suggests this is dwarfed by guys forcing gals.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

im gonna post a reversed version of this im really curious what'll happen

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

The difference is always that men (usually) have the strength to force themselves on women, the latter don't. If this guy didn't want to go down on her, he could just stop.

In broad strokes.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

part of the joke is the reversal of the stereotype.
breaking stereotypes = good
enforcing stereotypes = bad

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[–] AI_toothbrush 55 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yes i imagined it, very nice. Whats the next step?

[–] balderdash9 67 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

I love you and I'm saving this.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I agree that it would look quite different with the genders reversed. However, gender equality is not like mathematical equality, where every situation needs to be reversible.

Women have traditionally been less sex-positive and less dominant, which many consider indicators of a lack of true gender equality, so a progressive community will celebrate a reversal of that.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

Bad behavior is still bad behavior, regardless of who's doing it. The oppressed engaging in the same behavior as their former oppressors is not equality, it's just more oppression.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

But situations regarding the handling of power dynamics and standards of consent/coercion absolutely should be reversible.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Well, consent is non-negotiable. I understood the comic as depicting a consenting couple.

As for power dynamics, I'm certainly not on board with her having communicated, she had an emergency. That is just disrespectful. But that one looks bad on both genders.
The existence of power dynamics in a relationship in general always looks bad, for both sides, in my opinion.

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Nothing wrong with a consenting partner

[–] balderdash9 22 points 1 year ago

Yes, but not quite the point I was making

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I guess the problem is the assumption that the man is consenting. A meme is not a place to go for realistic depictions of sex, though. I think this one is playing off that to create conflict/engagement.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Everyone here will pretend they would be fine with it now that you called out the hypocrisy. Or they'll argue men deserve it as some kind of "payback", in which case it's really not about equality of course.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm sorry, they'll argue that men deserve what as a form of payback? Cause you're phrasing it like there's some kind of discrmination or persecution against men going on here and I fail to see it.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (5 children)

It doesn't have to be persecution to be sexist and therefore hypocritical in a culture that claims to be opposed to sexism. I'm personally fine with a joke like this, I just also happen to think that if the characters in this one were reversed there would be all sorts of outrage and accusations of toxic masculinity.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

What would be the issue then? 2 consenting people can show each other what they want sexually, no matter the gender

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It would be fine in a porn comic, but provoke a scandal in a "regular" memes community

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

In my mind she has a cock. She also is built like an amazon, so she can just lift me up and flip me round for some standing 69. Nice

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Its the internet. No imagination needed

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

My guess is that this was made by a dude who believes men and women can’t just be friends. I’m not sure if that’s an incel or not.

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