this post was submitted on 26 Sep 2023
345 points (100.0% liked)
Technology
37708 readers
347 users here now
A nice place to discuss rumors, happenings, innovations, and challenges in the technology sphere. We also welcome discussions on the intersections of technology and society. If it’s technological news or discussion of technology, it probably belongs here.
Remember the overriding ethos on Beehaw: Be(e) Nice. Each user you encounter here is a person, and should be treated with kindness (even if they’re wrong, or use a Linux distro you don’t like). Personal attacks will not be tolerated.
Subcommunities on Beehaw:
This community's icon was made by Aaron Schneider, under the CC-BY-NC-SA 4.0 license.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
Haha! I did that first, but didn't want to offend anyone, and redid. So, instead, apparently, I went with s/he, her/his... not sure that's better hahahaha
as an expert^1^ I can affirm that singular usage of they/them is absolutely acceptable in polite conversation with people who may be non-binary or with people whom you don't wish to assume what gender they identify as.
1 - Why am I claiming I am an expert? I'm nonbinary and trans myself; and I moderated /r/genderqueer for a long time; so I do see trends.
You mean say, "they is"? I can't do that. As an early ESL student, "they are" was hammered into me, and using plural noun as a singular noun, or vice versa, physically hurts me (as in, it actually causes me anxiety to say it). I don't mind hearing it, though. If this is not what you meant, would you mind elaborating?
No; afaik as a native speaker we use "they are". Even when using them in the singular form.
I can't do anything about your reaction. Using they as a singular word has been valid for a long time. (at least 10 years)
https://grammarist.com/usage/they/ https://www.verywellmind.com/they-them-pronouns-7110726
The article is dated 2023, which kind of adds to it's modern validity, so thank you for that. It does mention the use of "they are" referring to a singular person, as early as 1375. Looking into that further (off article), its use was generally only accepted when the gender of the person/animal was unknown. Regardless, I don't have an issue saying "they are" when referring to an individual (a Trans, for example). The hella annoying physical reaction is when I try to use "they is". So, follow-up question: "they are my friend" when referring to a Trans is fine? I mean, I don't have to use "they is my friend"?