this post was submitted on 30 Sep 2023
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I have a toddler (28 months) and an infant (4 months). I do love having conversations with my toddler, seeing her laugh, seeing her play, and watching her grow into a real human.
However, the infant stage, in my opinion, is a million times easier. In between the awesome toddler moments are tantrums, battles to get dressed, refusals to get into the car, etc. I love my toddler more than words. But man, do I just want her take longer naps sometimes!
My experience is completely anecdotal, so may not apply. Your toddler is like 2.5 years. I found it hard around that age, but after calmly setting boundaries, explaining why and being open to negotiation, at around 3 it became super easy.
Tantrums for my kid are 99% of the time just because he's hungry. I just explain this to him during and after the tantrum. Like "so you were really sad before, but after eating you're happy now right? Do you think that would help next time you are sad?" Now he will sometimes tell me he's just super hungry when he's upset.
Other than playing with him which I enjoy, he's like 70% in auto pilot.
We were lucky: our daughter was a super well-behaved toddler. I don’t think that she threw more than three tantrums, although she always cried when it was time to leave something, especially if she made a new friend. She was just curious and inquisitive and very empathetic—which she still is as an eleven-year-old. I do agree, I also wished she’d taken longer naps, but whatev. In contrast, she was extremely difficult as an infant, being colicky to the point that we’d have to drive around for hours at a time so she’d go to sleep and the fits came way too often.