this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2023
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As an ex-child, I figured it out on my own at the age of 6. You see, back then, our gifts would be given to us by a Santa Claus in a suit at our kindergarten, and the gifts would be what we wrote letters for with our parents. We would tell our parents, and they would "write" and "send" the letters. Then they would buy, pack, and label the present, and then bring it in to our kindergarten sometime earlier. On one of the last days when we break up for Christmas, the Santa would come to our kindergarten and we would take photos with them and our presents. After that, we would go home with the presents and get the photos soon. Now, as you can clearly see in the picture from the previous year, the santa has a very different beard and suit, far too different to be real. Alongside that, a roll of the same wrapping paper was hidden behind my parents' wardrobe, and last but not least, my name on the present was written in my mother's unique and very recognisable handwriting style. Not bad for a 6-year-old, huh?
I was also 6. I received California Games on Nintendo. It has a barcode. I thought, "what the hell does Santa need a barcode for?" Mom tried to tell me the elves couldn't make video games and I was like yeah right, you fucking bought that.
I was kinda on the opposite end of the spectrum lol. I remained steadfast in engaging with the Santa Claus mythos until a pretty late age despite my parents staight up telling me they were the ones getting me presents, and despite knowing that all evidence pointed to them telling the truth, lol.
Ugh my sister believed until she was 10. When I pointed out that the labels were in mom & dad's handwriting, she said Santa had a special pen that mimics other people's handwriting (why? no idea). Like come on dawg you're in the double digits now, you've gotta be smarter than this.