this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2023
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I’ve been hooking up with a girl i knew from my high school years for the past month now. She has no job and she lives at home with her parents. She hasn’t had a job since she got fired from her last job at a clothing store (about 8 months ago). I can’t say I’m in love although we do say i love you to each other. She kind of brought up the idea yesterday after we had sex. Not going to lie I’m a little scared. What should i do? Do i break up with her? Should i make an ultimatum that if she wants to move in with me she needs to get a job first? Edit: she wants to move into my apartment

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Personally what I wanted in a woman is one who would stay home, give me children, take care of those children and cook me food. So a job and college degree was not important to me. Though my wife did have like an associate degree and a part time job when I met her. She quit after I got her pregnant.

Those things could be indicators of a stable mind though. Depending on her age. A college degree could also indicate she was plowed through by dozens of men and you are the result of her settling in a man who isn't her dream but a safe choice . Avoid those types. They will just take your money.

I've had a woman who basically would never leave and the police told me I had to give her a 30 days notice even though she technically didn't even live there. She just slept over all the time.

When they live with you you open yourself up to several problems.

My advice, if you have not talked with her and agreed about how many children you want, what your goals are you should probably leave and find another girl or two to get over her with.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

“A college degree could also indicate she was plowed through by dozens of men and you are the result of her settling in a man who isn’t her dream but a safe choice .” This came to my mind

[–] zipmethod 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Lol lets hope he is an incel or else his poor wife is the only actual woman who settled.

In reality there is no right answer. Does she make you happy? Does she contribute to your life? Contribution doesnt have to be financial. It can be also emotional contribution like positivity and desire to help both your lives get better. It can also be as simple as making sure your day to day lives are better like cooking and cleaning. But that doesnt have to be her designated role in order for success.

If you can pay the bills and function without her contribution and she makes you happy, go for it. If you need her help and she doesnt want to give it, you will eventually resent her and you need to save both of your times and leave.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Thanks for the advice

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago