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Check on your male friends to see if they need help (slrpnk.net)

submitted 10 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

No it’s not. Biologically speaking there is no difference between male and female brains that justifies having half the human population’s emotional needs neglected. It’s all down to arbitrary social rules and barriers about male stoicism that do not apply to modern day society.

If you want to tough it out, feel free to, but only because you personally chose to do it. Not because “That’s how it has always been” or because you’ll be ridiculed by others. All men should be able to choose what emotions they show, when to show them, and how to show them without fearing ridicule.

[+] [email protected] -30 points 10 months ago (5 children)

so if i tell you for example that my life sucks and i've lost everything and fucked up every chance that i was given by some miraculous faith you would care like there's not enough shit going on in your own life? we, men, are who we are because everyone got their own problems and their own shit going on in their own lives, so it's just a waste of time, energy and sanity to care about other men's wellbeing if you don't have a real bond with them. if i start to care about every guy on the internet and care about their problems i will just kill myself eventually, and i don't expect a different treatment to myself either. it is what it is.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I mean I would care as much as I can for an internet stranger.

I never said anything about caring about every man ever, but you don’t seem to realize that you don’t even care about the men in your life if you apply the same “Tough it out then kill yourself” attitude to them as you’re espousing right now.

And do you think women don’t have equally heavy issues going on in their lives? Do you think no woman out there has ever lost everything and fucked up every chance they get? But societally speaking it’s more acceptable to get help and talk about their fuck ups without judgement.

I’m clearly not going to change your mind, but like…I hope you can talk to someone about the stuff you’re dealing with, or at least give yourself some grace and forgiveness. Existence is really hard already.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Do you think no woman out there has ever lost everything and fucked up every chance they get? But societally speaking it’s more acceptable to get help and talk about their fuck ups without judgement.

I think you're forgetting that it's infinately easier for women to do this as well. just as in OP's post, people ask women if they are ok. women are engaged by strangers if they are crying on a park bench. men are mocked. I don't know if you're a man or woman, but it's rough out there for a dude.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

No, I’m not forgetting it. What I’m saying is that it’s easier for women BECAUSE of the perpetuation of the “suck it up men” attitude by other men like OP. And that needs to stop.

Women do it to other men too, don’t get me wrong, but if you** (presumed male) know how hard it is for men out there, why are you not reaching out to your male peers? Is that not just perpetuating the status quo? Change has to start somewhere, and it should be within our male peergroups.

**you in a general, singular sense, not you specifically FontMasterFlex

[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 months ago

I care and I sincerely hope that your life doesn't suck. Also, I personally don't find it to be a waste of time to care about anyone's well being or problems, so if you need to unload anything, I'll listen.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 10 months ago

"so if i tell you for example that my life sucks and i’ve lost everything and fucked up every chance that i was given"

Have you considered that your depression might be influencing your perspective on this?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Totally unrelated to my last reply, but you might find this interesting. Not sure I've read anything that explains so much about human behavior. I read it a time or two a year. Let me know what you think.

https://www.cracked.com/article_14990_what-monkeysphere.html