No Stupid Questions
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Yes and no. There are certainly concerns with "little dictators" hosting instances or individuals with an agenda manipulating content on their instance. The difference to a site like reddit or twitter is that this power and influence stops at the instance border, nobody controls lemmy, so people can always migrate to another instance if something like this happens.
And with reddit, admins don't just control individual subreddits. There are of course admins that control all of reddit.
This is just an normal characteristic of decentralized services in general and I think it will resolve itself over time. There are of course also many different websites that host similar content and there are similar subreddits that host similar content. Over time, one will establish itself and become the main community.
Information tends to be more transparent and open on the fediverse. Stuff you post on lemmy is not private. Your personal information you provide when signing-up is of course readable by the person who hosts the instance or people who have admin access. However, at the moment at least, lemmy instances are not run for profit and don't use/sell your data for profit.
There are privacy concerns, there are always privacy concerns. It's important to teach users how to protect themselvs by consciously controlling what information they reveal about themselves. This is much more important and effective than trying to control what others might do with your information.
Here I have to speculate because I just don't know enough about the technical side of it. At the moment, most issues seem to be cause by software bugs, not by too much traffic or hardware performance.
Handling high amounts of traffic and activity is always tricky. I believe scalability will probably be an issue that will arise, maybe sooner than later, but I don't think it's an unsolvable issue.
I'm running a small instance with around 55 communities/magazines. But, running on kbin. I'm currently getting an average of 5 federation messages a second, of course most of them are like notifications. The LA on the server is 1.55 1.35 1.05 right now, that's with a 16 thread cpu, and the server is also doing a lot of other things. At the current level of traffic, the load of federation at least is negligible.
I only have myself as a user right now though, because for whatever reason my instance doesn't show up in fedidb unless you actually search for it. But it's not in any of the lists they publish of instances they are blocking or hiding.