this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2024
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Up until I started working, I didn't really encounter that question. When I did start working, people started asking me that question.

Them: Where are you from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Where are your grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Ok, where are your great grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

It's irritating sometimes. I just want to exist, do my job and go home, like anyone else. Once is ok, twice is odd, three times is weird, and the fourth time is a pattern.

The only accent that I might have would probably be from Newfoundland, Canada, as I grew up with a lot of people from there. I also talk too fast sometimes.

Have you had similar experiences, and if so, how did you handle it? Can fast speech patterns cause this? Why do random people care so much?

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[–] [email protected] 43 points 9 months ago (1 children)

They're either making conversation or racist, depending on context. Answering the country you're from if you're currently in that country is pretty odd.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 9 months ago (4 children)

But that is the answer to the question. I'm not understanding the alternative. If the person wants to ask, "What race are you?" They should ask using those words.

I can't recall a time ever needing to know anyone's race. So I've never asked this question in 50 years, but perhaps one day? Idk, seems like a potentially insensitive question.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I don't think being interested in the (ancestors') race of a co-worker is necessary racist. I worked with people with all kinds of cultural backgrounds and it might be just an interesting topic to talk about. If someone has family in Iran, Senegal or Indonesia that's definitely more interesting to me than a conversation about weather or last night's football game.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Definitely agree with this. I'll try to ask this in order to connect with their culture (such as with traditional cooking), but I can see why someone would have their guard up when asked. It's all about intentions

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Personally when someone asks me where I'm from, I respond in order of:

A) if I'm in my home city, I tell them the province I grew up in (because I came from a small town I would never expect anyone to know, if it was a big city I'd say that.)

B) If I'm away from my home city in my home province, I tell them my home city.

C) if I'm away from my home province, I tell them my home province.

D) if I'm away from Canada I'll tell them I'm from Canada

E) if based on context it seems they're asking about my ethnic background, I tell them I'm some kind of western/northern European mutt.

Now obviously I'm white as hell and no accent, but OP is saying they're basically that as well, so I'm not sure why race would be the assumption for them either. I don't even know how I would respond if i asked someone at work where they're from and they answered Canada.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

I think asking where someone is from is a pretty universal way to mean, “What ethnicity are you?”.

Usually, you can understand someone’s question based on the context. Your question, for example, “What race are you?” Is not specific enough. I could answer, “I’m not a race, I’m a person, but I enjoy competing in races.”

So just use context clues to understand a persons question and answer the question if you feel like it.