this post was submitted on 14 Jul 2023
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Socialanxiety
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Mine are talking too much and making jokes. As a result, I don't come off as someone with social anxiety since people assume I'd be quiet and shy. But on the inside, I'm very much anxious. This has gotten much better with practice, especially the talking too much. I forced myself to stay quiet even when it was uncomfortable. Still working on not making too many (inappropriate) jokes when anxious.
I tend to be quiet around new people but then I feel like I've already "branded" myself as the quiet one and when I get comfortable enough to have a conversation, i might still not talk because now it feels like too big of a jump from not talking to talking a lot.
Usually with alcohol I can skip the analyzing step but then there might be a point when I get overwhelmed and I'll just zone out, as if I'm just observing the conversation like a ghost or a fly in the wall.
i am a jokester too, what got me into many awkward silences xD just happy to see i am not alone with this copeing mechanism