this post was submitted on 05 Apr 2024
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Privacy
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I have two kids. I asked people to use signal to send and receive the photos. Asking people to follow your requirements only works for the direct immediate communication. The photos of my kids were sent by the recipients I sent them to (over signal) to other members of the family, over gmail (unencrypted), WhatsApp, Instagram, etc. I learned that years after.
This was in direct violation of my express requests. When I confronted them, they played dumb.
So, not to be a buzzkill here OP, but if you did this to get more people to use your messenger of choice, good job, it worked. If you did this so the pics of your kids stayed on safe apps, don't fool yourself. They didn't.
That's OK, I understand that unfortunately it's only a matter of time until images of them end up somewhere I don't want want them, either through ignorance or a difference in values. That's the world we live in right now sadly. But hopefully I can delay and minimise it a bit, open a better channel of communication with a few friends and relatives and perhaps raise some awareness in the process.
I'm genuinely sorry to hear about your experience, especially with the pictures of them ending up on instagram. At least you were responsible as a parent and tried to do your best.
Its important to share and celebrate the birth of a child with your community. Yet another part of our lives that has been compromised by the degradation of our privacy unfortunately.
Absolutely.
Yeah, my strategy is to not share pictures of my kids at all. I can hold my phone up in front of people's face so they can look if they want, but that's it.
My relatives hated this strategy, and I wasn't the only one who suffered from it. They guilted me for it, but also guilted my parents and siblings. As if they are entitled to the details of my daughter.
People could handle (though they were vocally unhappy about it) is keeping the baby off Facebook. They could not handle me not sending pics on (Facebook) messenger, and they couldn't handle me not telling me the birth weight.
Multiple boomers got very upset that I wanted to keep that information private.
Man that sounds really horrible. I'm sorry to hear your relatives were so unsupportive. I hope everyone gets along now.
My immediate family was all on board, so no big worries. It was the Grand parent level that thought I was being unreasonable with the privacy stuff. None of them ever be brought it up directly to me, just to my husband and my parents, so I could never really address it.