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can you help me formulate an answer to a colleague who is not my boss but feels entitled to tell me how I have to work? (linux.community)

submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

38 comments fedilink hide all child comments

cross-posted from: https://linux.community/post/803244

the colleague in question feels that only her way of doing things is the right one and expects me to adapt to her way of thinking and her logic. This is tiring and burdensome because I have to force me to stop doing things automatically and efficiently, but think how she wants it done and do it her way. I work worse when this happens.

There are several ways to reach the same goal and I always adapt according to the situation at hand. I do what feels logic at the time and work my way.

I already told the charge nurse charge about it but I don't know if she had a conversation with this coworker and what was said.

The message has to be neutral and polite. What do you think of this?

I feel you believe you are my boss. You are not. Stop telling me how to work. It's tiring. You have your way of doing things, I've got mine, both equally good. Should you have a problem with this, contact the charge or manager. I'm gonna go work now.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 8 months ago

Rule number 1 in a work dispute is to always place yourself as the better person. Even if there are a million things you'd like to say to that person, say whatever is needed to make sure that an outsider looking in would see you as the more sympathetic.

The proposed message seems a bit too direct and harsh, and if scrutinized might be seen as confrontational. I would probably word it more like:

"Hey, thank you for all the advice. I've had a lot of time to try what you've suggested, but in the end I've decided that the way I've been doing things just makes more sense for me after all. I appreciate your perspective though, and I'm glad you have a workflow that works better for you."

Based on the "charge nurse" mention, I am assuming you work in a hospital setting, so you could also throw in a "My main priority is patient care, and I would hate to cause any potential harm if I end up messing something up because it's not the way I'm used to doing it."

That being said, again assuming this is a hospital environment, I'd also like to encourage the following:

Be mindful of potential regulatory slip-ups that you can get dinged for. The technology and documentation that you work with isn't the authority on following best practices, you are. The EMR won't always stop you from doing something wrong, even if it seems "easier".
Confirm with the charge/manager that there isn't some other necessary element that your coworker's workflow satisfies but yours might miss. They are just as stressed as everyone else and can't watch every instance of care during every hour of the day. That's what periodic audits are for, and sometimes things may not accurately paint a picture of your performance if they measure one metric but you are using another.
If your IT people tell you that X is the new way of doing things and Y will be going away, do your best to get used to X as quickly as possible. Sometimes the change is overblown, Y still works even after X is added, but you don't want to have 8 patients on your list for the day and suddenly have to make significant workflow changes if that turns out to not be the case. And similar to what was mentioned before, sometimes changes are regulatory in nature.