this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2024
161 points (97.1% liked)

NonCredibleDefense

6368 readers
1140 users here now

A community for your defence shitposting needs

Rules

1. Be niceDo not make personal attacks against each other, call for violence against anyone, or intentionally antagonize people in the comment sections.

2. Explain incorrect defense articles and takes

If you want to post a non-credible take, it must be from a "credible" source (news article, politician, or military leader) and must have a comment laying out exactly why it's non-credible. Random twitter and YouTube comments belong in the Low Hanging Fruit thread.

3. Content must be relevant

Posts must be about military hardware or international security/defense. This is not the page to fawn over Youtube personalities, simp over political leaders, or discuss other areas of international policy.

4. No racism / hatespeech

No slurs. No advocating for the killing of people or insulting them based on physical, religious, or ideological traits.

5. No politics

We don't care if you're Republican, Democrat, Socialist, Stalinist, Baathist, or some other hot mess. Leave it at the door. This applies to comments as well.

6. No seriousposting

We don't want your uncut war footage, fundraisers, credible news articles, or other such things. The world is already serious enough as it is.

7. No classified material

Classified information is off limits regardless of how "open source" and "easy to find" it is.

8. Source artwork

If you use somebody's art in your post or as your post, the OP must provide a direct link to the art's source in the comment section, or a good reason why this was not possible (such as the artist deleting their account). The source should be a place that the artist themselves uploaded the art. A booru is not a source. A watermark is not a source.

9. No low-effort posts

No egregiously low effort posts. These include Social media screenshots with a title punchline / no punchline, recent (after the start of the Ukraine War) reposts, simple reaction & template memes, and images with the punchline in the title. Put these in weekly Low effort thread instead.

10. Don't get us banned

No brigading or harassing other communities. Do not post memes with a "haha people that I hate died… haha" punchline or violating the sh.itjust.works rules (below). This includes content illegal in Canada.


Join our Matrix chatroom


Other communities you may be interested in


Banner made by u/Fertility18

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
top 23 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This video is the materialization of the intrusive thought I was having when I started watching this video.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

"Touch it. Make it go, "Pew! Pew!""

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's gotta be super illegal, glad someone is taking care of the plane's needs though

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I mean its inappropriate but touching it isn't exactly illegal, you aren't damaging it or anything.

Also there was no don't do the Plane sign.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

But officer, there wasn't a sign that said I couldn't fuck the plane

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Tomorrow

"Hey Jenkins, what's with that new sign you're installing?"

"Don't ask, but remember, every sign is put up for a reason."

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Man, I wish I had that many dicks.

What are the extra "dicks" for, exactly?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Looks like pitot tubes, for measuring air speed and altitude.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Hmm. So probably two so it can measure yaw by the difference in pressures. Then you have the air spike on the front that was attended to by this good Samaritan. That still leaves one mystery dick.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You wouldn’t measure yaw by the pitot tubes. I suppose it’s theoretically possible, but it would be complicated and imprecise. Yaw is measured by a gyro (modern planes are a laser ring gyro rather than a spinny gyro). The pitot tubes would all feed into air data computers for various systems. Flight instrumentation would have at least three (redundancy and error checking) and the fourth could possibly be for weapons systems or something similar, not sure.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Maybe the weird arrangement is just another stealth feature. Refueling, antenna and aerodynamic are also possible purposes I can think of for such a projection.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Here I was, ready to reply about wacky "pilot tubes", then re-read and saw it's piTot tubes

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Whoa, didn’t see that coming.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Rare opportunity for multiple level pun, I had to take it, even if other’s don’t seem to appreciate the joke.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It's got a wacky texture on it too. (Don't ask me how I know...)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Very well, I demand an explanation on how you know that. This is not a question

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

It was revealed to me in a delusion

I definitely didn't also touch it...

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

This is before they dip it in chocolate

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

OwO what’s this? Nuzzles radar array—how's your signal strength, over? Your engines are emitting some serious warmth. 🛩️ *Scans fuel intake* 🛢️ A bulge? Roger that, ground control. Someone's happy in the hangar today. 😎 Nuzzles your sleek fuselage, purring like a Pratt & Whitney engine. ⚙️ *Cleaning the cockpit glass* You're so big, radar signature is off the charts! Rubs your aerodynamic curves—it's like your airframe doesn't know when to quit. 🎯 *Locks on target* Kisses you, then licks your necky—mommy likies, indeed. I hope the chief engineer approves of my maneuvers. *Flight control override engaged* I've got an itch, ground crew. A seven-meter itch, to be precise. Can you assist? Squirms and wags my wings. 🛬 *Emergency descent protocol* Permission to be punished, sir? Runs my ailerons down your fuselage, bites my lip—this is gonna be one wild barrel roll. 🔄 *Full afterburner* Paws on your bulge, eyes glowing like HUD displays. I'm thirsty, and it's not for aviation fuel. *Unbuttons your pants, licks the shaft* Mmmm, oily goodness. Drools all over your daddy meat. Fondles Mr. Fuzzy—yes, I love the joystick. 🕹️ *Inhales deeply* Oh, God—punish me, daddy! Nyea~ Squirms and wiggles, loving your oily essence. Bites my lip again. *Engaging vertical climb* Please, punish me. Licks my lips, savoring your goodness. Eyes roll back as you go deep - give me your G-force! *Supersonic moans* Suckles your control stick, oscillating wildly. 🥵

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

HUD displays

The redundancy (heads-up display display) and improper pluralization killed the mood like an open bomb bay door.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Call me a middle eastern military base because I want it to blow it's load all over me 🥵💦