this post was submitted on 30 Oct 2024
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Autism

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Ok, yall. Check this out.

Problem

ADHD

  • Frequently showing up late to things because you miscalculated the time it would take to get ready and the extra time you need to find all the things you misplaced or realized you forgot once you left. Also, you might be focused on something when it's time to start getting ready and you don't want to give that rare drive up. Getting to places early gives you too much time to get hyperactive and get into that nervous boredom state.

Autism

  • Transitions aren't natural. We want things to stay stable and the same. Transitioning from one environment to the other takes extra time to get used to it. Rushing it makes us feel unprepared, confused, and takes up more mental energy. Because of this, we may delay the transition and end up being late.

Solution

Plan to get anywhere you are going 15+ mins early and have a task you want to complete in those 15+ mins.

  1. This would ensure you get there on time.
  2. It is also productive so you don't feel like you're there wasting time, feeling perceived, and controlling your stimming.
  3. It gives you 15+ mins to get used to the environment and transition, so you can show up calm.
  4. Since you're busy doing a task during that time, either in your car or apart from everyone, you don't have to participate in the small talk session.

Benefits

  • Start being on time to things
  • Less anxiety and stress when running late
  • Less sense of shame for being a habitual late person
  • Accomplish minor tasks
  • Arrive to location/event calm and with more energy
  • More energy means better focus on task/event
  • Avoid small talk

Yoooooooo 🤯

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

I do this all the time. Also wearing headphones and listening to music to avoid people trying to talk to you once you arrive somewhere, so they won't distract you from your plans.

I'm usually even 30-45 mins earlier because my problem is rather what to do with that time before having an appointment. I will just sit at home and get nothing done until it's time to get ready and leave, so I'm better off leaving the house. Take a stroll in a nearby park (if I'm familiar with the area - it's great to calm down), or I'll get some food and eat (if I feel comfortable) and just sit down and read as I've arrived.

Oh well, there's those other days as well where I just forget time and am in a rush to get to places and forget half the things I need. Definitely prefer the first version...

[–] anonvurr 1 points 1 week ago

That's such a big problem for me! I had no idea that it was common, I just thought that I wasn't motivated enough.