this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2023
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Memes

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submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 
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[–] [email protected] 89 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (5 children)

Add to this that the child is also made entirely of rubber and could easily withstand the train's impact and experience no measurable hardship. However, the impact of Superman halting the train caused wreckage to fly all over the place and damage the surrounding infrastructure.... which in this case is a metaphor for literal fucking infrastructure.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 months ago

You are a poet.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago

Also add that the child is slipping a stack of Benjamins into Supermans trunks.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Honestly switching the places of the boy and Superman would probably work.

[–] [email protected] 68 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Not pictured: The carnage inside the train as the masses of regular taxplayers get thrown around in the process of protecting the wealthy.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Nor the small boy giving superman a fat stack of cash

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

It's not even a fat stack

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago

At this point I think we're more like the railroad ties that Superman is bulldosing through.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 9 months ago (5 children)

Why didn't Superman just grab the child and fly away?

[–] [email protected] 25 points 9 months ago

Superman had no idea there was child there, he just wanted to fuck up a train.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago (1 children)

It's the trolley problem. Picking up a kid in time to beat a speeding train would just snap his little neck. Stopping a speeding train to save the little boy would most likely kill anyone on board.

This scenario indicates superman would rather kill a train full of people, rather than having witnesses see him sit idle as a child removes himself from the gene pool.

My hypothesis is that this is the child of Lex Luther, or possibly a clone. He's literally playing on train train tracks, baiting super man into a win-less scenario via the trolley problem. It's the perfect scheme to slowly make him question the consequences of all his actions and eventually his entire purpose.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

He was feeling a bit Hancock that day.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Where is my Bourbon?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

The train was carrying electric sharing kick scooters to be deployed into metropolis and Superman wasn't about to let it happen

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Because it's an Amtrak.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Idiots at work. It would be easier to get the kid off the track than to stop an entire train.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago

Moreover, that conductor is going to die, no question.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago

Superheroes protecting the status quo. How innovative

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You could switch "politicians" for "mouth breathers that make $30k but assume they could be a billionaire any day now if they play their cards right"

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

To be fair, if you play cards right you can make a lot of money. Poker tounament players do get sponsors.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

they are the same people