Asklemmy

I was on a train to paris which hit a person. The train made an extremely abrupt stop which spilled a bunch of drinks and made an old lady fall down. Then after about 5 minutes they made an announcement in French and we heard everyone gasp audibly, before they repeated the announcement in English.

When we got off the train, after a considerable delay, they had set up a tent around the track and the train and - I swear I am not making this up - gave us croissants, before putting us on a bus to the nearest train station.

To this day, I am still unsure if the strangest part was the fact that my vehicle turned another human into a fine mist, or that I was compensated for this inconvenience with a croissant.

Asleep one night in the summer with my windows open, house is facing onto a quiet residential street. Around 2am something comes flying in my window and I yell "what the fuck", it's a soccer ball.

I look outside, nobody there, probably just some stupid kids. Go back to sleep. An hour later something comes else comes flying in the window - a brand new stick of butter still wrapped in foil. Look outside, they're gone. WTF but go back to sleep.

The butter incident happens several more times over the following months. One time the bell rang, my roommate opened the door and I hear her yell "I think it's for you". I go and look and there's a stick of butter on the door mat.

One day it happens again but we're more prepared, we see someone wearing a motorcycle helmet leave the butter and then bolt. My roommate chases him down the street and rips the helmet off, to find it's another mutual friend who we thought had left the country. The initial soccer ball + butter was just some random kids, but then my friend picked it up and ran with it. Going so far as to lie about flight dates for a vacation so that we'd think he was out of the country and not suspect him.

Also once watched a gas tanker slowly reverse over a sedan at a gas station and just crush it, while the owners are standing there watching.

I was at an intersection once in a friend's car. This was about 20 years ago: cell phones, esp ones that could take videos and pics, were not there yet.

Anyway, we were on the way home from work, just sitting there not saying anything. Then here comes this jeep, flipping through the intersection. Now, the intersection is big, like 4 lanes intersecting with 4 lanes, but not exactly at a square angle, and it must've been about 3/4 of a football field worth of length this jeep flipped.

The front end would hit the ground and then it would bounce up and roll in the air, then the ass end would hit the ground and so on. All the while it's coming towards us slightly, but seemed to be drifting towards a gas station to our right. Now, this is in the middle of Rush Hour traffic, and somehow no one moved - everyone is just frozen, holding their breath, waiting to see if this jeep was going to careen into a gas pump and cause a huge explosion.

I'm not sure how many times it flipped, but it finally came to rest in a green patch of grass in front of the gas pumps right-side up, like some sort of insane Jeep ad.

The driver emerged - a young lady - she seemed to be ok, besides perhaps a little bewilderment and dizziness. She proceeded to just stand there staring at the jeep for a while. Then she looked around, as if to ask "Does anyone know if this is ok - what just happened?" I shrugged with my mouth agape, as if to respond, "I have no idea, and I'm a little freaked out." Then our light turned green, and we drove away.

I have never seen anything like that in my life, and I still think back about it and try to figure out how the jeep got into that movement, and I just have no idea. It was all over in a blink of an eye. So bizarre.

Wandering through a field at Glastonbury festival once at 3 in the morning and crossed paths with a portaloo moving of its own accord and dancing. It had fairy lights on it and was playing Johnny Cash's Ring of Fire.

You often see odd things at Glastonbury but nobody else I was with saw it. Nobody else I spoke to afterwards who went saw it either. I was relatively sober as well.

It was brilliantly surreal.

I once saw a naked hippy masturbating on a unicycle in a children's playground in the middle of the day. He kept falling off, then scrambling back on and going back at it.

Was sitting on a bench on a sunny afternoon in the city, minding my own business. Some rough-looking old man walks up to the bin next to the bench I sit on, unzips his trousers, and pees into the bin like it’s the most normal thing in the world.

Not so much an incident, but an unsolved mystery in my life that I don't think I'll ever know the answer to:

A few years ago some friends of mine and I were going to a concert and left our cars in a parking lot in an office park near the arena and piled into one car.

When I came back a few hours later that night, there was a dead duck on the hood of my car. It was still warm, there was no damage to my car, no feathers floating around anywhere, no blood on the duck (it hadn't been shot or attacked as far as I could tell), it was just there by itself on the hood of my car. It wasn't duck hunting season, and this is in a city with over a million people so not a rural area.

I've asked all my friends, family if they know what happened, but nope. No one has confessed anything, and at this point I think anyone of my friends would've fessed up.

I'm just baffled.

It was like a duck landed on the hood of my car and dropped dead a few minutes before I got there on a random weeknight.

I have no clue how, why or what happened.

The first thing that came into my mind was an incident that happened a few years back.

And friend and I walked down a quite street that had many apartment buildings. Suddenly in one building, just at the entrance, there was a weird fight happening. One man stole the luggage from another man. They did not yell at each other, they did not hurt each other. They were only fighting for that black luggage. As soon as the thief was successful, he fled with the suitcase into a car and drove away. We asked the other man if he needs our help as witnesses and if we should call the police. But he kept weirdly calm about it. He said he knows the thief.

I still wonder, what was in that suitcase and how this weird situation played out from the beginning.