this post was submitted on 28 Jan 2024
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me_irl

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[–] [email protected] 135 points 9 months ago (14 children)

Lpt: DO NOT ASK A PERSON IF THEY HAVE FOUND A JOB YET

If they have and you're important enough to them, you'll know when they tell you. If they haven't told you, either it's none of your GODDAMN BUSINESS or they're still looking.

You asking just reminds them they don't have a job. And if they've been looking for awhile, it's even worse. Especially if you actually said "yet" or added in some other "it's been awhile" modifier.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Nah, sorry. If you've got a lazy teenager (or even adult) living rent free in your basement, you have every right to pressure them about finding a job.

[–] [email protected] 54 points 9 months ago (5 children)

This is one of the toughest job markets I've ever experienced for specialized labor. I was part of the tech industry layoffs last year and I busted my ass for months before I got an offer. Many people I know are going through the same thing. It was honestly more draining than my actual job and I'd occasionally reach a burnout point where I couldn't even look at listings without being consumed by anxiety and dread.

On top of that, I was still paying ludicrous rent prices because the housing market is also shite and by the end of my unemployed period my net worth had been cut by almost 50%. I'm fortunate enough to have had an emergency fund but having the option to live rent free in my parent's basement sure would have been nice.

Obviously, every situation is different. But I'd advise anyone to be aware of the situation and ask how they can support somebody going through that rather than assuming they're just being lazy and regularly pestering them.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

i dunno, that culture of everything (even your care for your son) being transactional and people kicking their kids out of the house at 18 for being "leeches" doesnt seem like it helps a lot. feels like extreme alienation.

it doesnt help that working and paying rent is significantly more difficult than it used to be for the previous generations. despite advancing technology we now have to slave away much worse to afford living.

all that said, i guess the problem its on the tone of it or how culture is in that regard, not so much about just the act of asking. i think capitalists have succesfully associated the grind with some sort of virtue.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Except pressuring them is counterproductive and demotivating. Just adds to their stress and shame

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

The right kind of positive reinforcement can help people who are feeling depressed and defeated. Sometimes just being there and letting them know they're not alone in this, that they aren't unique in hating the job hunt, and that we all know how dysfunctional the system is can be the sympathetic boost they need to give it another go.

Just ignoring and isolating someone who is struggling isn't helpful either. Especially if they're paralyzed by anxiety or confusion.

The stress and the shame comes from feeling like you don't fit in. And the job hunting process necessarily involves a lot of rejections - often deeply personal rejections on subjects you had historically felt quite good about. Helping someone score even a minor W can count for a lot.

In my experience, one of the best cures to job hunt paralysis is volunteering. When you're working with other people to do something useful and beneficial to others, you get the sense that you really do have skills and add value to others. Also, its a good way to get outside your bubble and meet people who might want to pay you to do shit. If nothing else, the folks you volunteer with are usually good for a referral.

But just hiding in a dark room all day is fucking awful for the human psyche.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

If you’ve got a lazy teenager (or even adult) living rent free in your basement

I mean, pressure has its place. But when it becomes a particularly sore subject, especially in a tight job market, you're just poking an open wound.

If you want to help someone get on their feet, maybe try... actually helping. "Hey, I found someone looking to hire an entry level thing-you-do and here's the contact information" / "I saw a help-wanted sign over at the place that has jobs you're looking to fill" / "I asked my friend if they have any openings at Company and it sounds like they might be willing to give you a referral" is vastly more helpful than "Have you tried looking online yet?"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Old people trying to help are always useless.

It was always something incredibly basic like:

"Have you tried writing a CV."

Or incredibly stupid like

"Just march in there and demand a job."

Or the most annoying.

"This person needs insert free labour, that'll be good. No they can't afford to hire anyone so you won't get paid."

Nepotism works, if you can use nepotism you might help. Otherwise you probably have no idea what you're doing.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Thanks for your input, I will continue to ask them.

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Not sure if this is the right place to start this conversation, but I find glassdoor much more pleasing and respectful than linkedin. If you're struggling to get a job maybe give it a shot, it's incredibly though out there right now, best of luck to all of you!!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Glassdoor has its kinks, but LinkedIn is just six MLMs in a trench coat.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

All of MLM energy but for people with slightly better -- but only slightly -- bullshit detectors.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

linkedin is Facebook for "professionals"

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (3 children)

I'm back at the job I walked out on five months ago, started again today

Someone kill me please god end this it isn't worth it nothing is worth this

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

I'm sure you had your reasons.

Employers prefer it if you are already taken.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 9 months ago (3 children)

For americans: governmentjobs.com

Boomers are retiring and dying like flies.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 9 months ago (2 children)

usajobs.gov is the official posting site for federal government jobs. The link above is to some kind of commercial site trying to charge for what is freely available.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago

The link I posted is the site used by many state and local governments for job postings. It acts as a hub for hundreds of agencies in the country. Essentially everything non federal that has not seen quality applicants for generations.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I applied to like 80 jobs on usajobs.gov. didn't get a single call back.....for about 6 months. I had a job by that point.

I got a call back from almost every single job I applied for wanting an interview. Not joking. I got about 10 calls a week for around 2 months or so.....like fucking hell guys, you could a called half a fucking year ago. Nobody can wait that long to be unemployed.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

It is definitely a ‘lifestyle choice’ to hire on with the feds. Yes, everyone, be warned that Federal hiring is slow AF! I am trying to get on after losing a contract so my strategy is basically to find another job so I can job while I job!

It seems worth it for the job security and long term retirement benefits, but dang!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago

I got a entry-level job in local government and was quickly promoted then poached by another city.

I more than doubled my initial pay in 13 months and on top of that government jobs have bonkers benefits. I get medical, dental, and vision 100% covered, get 6 weeks off a year between vacation and comp time (plus another 3 weeks of sick leave), a ton of paid holidays, and the city double-matches my retirement, so I put in 7% and get 21%.

Government jobs are where it's at if you want stability and good benefits. The pay can be on the low side, but after the cost of insurance and proper retirement planning, the private sector isn't always a lot better.

And knowing that I'm helping to make the town better instead of filling some rich asshole's pockets is a lot more satisfying.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Impressive amount of anger in these comments

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago
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