Travail

There are two problems with your idea.

First, in a true "community" situation, the parents will have been giving to their community their whole lives. Most of the modern "it takes a ViLlAgE!" parents are entitled mooches looking for handouts; they've rarely lifted a finger for anyone outside of friends and family.

Second, disciplining children used to be a community action. Anyone from the community could chastise a child, or tell the parents and expect the behavior to be corrected. Many modern parents become the defensive "mama bear/papa bear" when someone doesn't worship their child (or worse, is critical of them). They may encourage their childrens' bad behavior, or make excuses for it ("kids will be kids").

TL;DR: Modern 'parenting' is diametrically opposed to "the village"

You could try asking how she is doing, not her family.

Realistically, a lot of parents are so enmeshed/co-dependent they'll misperceive any negativity (or lack of sufficient positivity) as an attack.

Something about equating the choice to have kids with reducing the climate impact leaves me with an icky feeling. Not all humans have the same climate impact, so not all children would, either

I've had friends with kids. Children absolutely have a climate impact.

Diapers - disposable and reusable - have an impact. Car seats have an impact, and an expiration date. Kids outgrow clothes and shoes quickly, so replacements have to be created. (Yes, thrifting and large families can minimize (but not eliminate) that impact). Children are literal additional mouths to feed. Depending on the childrens' age and quantity, the parents may need larger vehicles and houses.

And that's just the required stuff. Children's toys, gadgets, and hobbies also have climate impacts.