this post was submitted on 27 May 2024
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neurodiverse

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What is Neurodivergence?

It's ADHD, Autism, OCD, schizophrenia, anxiety, depression, bi-polar, aspd, etc etc etc etc

“neurologically atypical patterns of thought or behavior”

So, it’s very broad, if you feel like it describes you then it does as far as we're concerned


Rules

1.) ableist language=post or comment will probably get removed (enforced case by case, some comments will be removed and restored due to complex situations). repeated use of ableist language=banned from comm and possibly site depending on severity. properly tagged posts with CW can use them for the purposes of discussing them

2.) always assume good faith when dealing with a fellow nd comrade especially due to lack of social awareness being a common symptom of neurodivergence

2.5) right to disengage is rigidly enforced. violations will get you purged from the comm. see rule 3 for explanation on appeals

3.) no talking over nd comrades about things you haven't personally experienced as a neurotypical chapo, you will be purged. If you're ND it is absolutely fine to give your own perspective if it conflicts with another's, but do so with empathy and the intention to learn about each other, not prove who's experience is valid. Appeal process is like appealing in user union but you dm the nd comrade you talked over with your appeal (so make it a good one) and then dm the mods with screenshot proof that you resolved it. fake screenies will get you banned from the site, we will confirm with the comrade you dm'd.

3.5) everyone has their own lived experiences, and to invalidate them is to post cringe. comments will be removed on a case by case basis depending on determined level of awareness and faith

4.) Interest Policing will not be tolerated in any form. Support your comrades in their joy!

Further rules to be added/ rules to be changed based on community input

RULES NOTE: For this community more than most we understand that the clarity and understandability of these rules is very important for allowing folks to feel comfortable, to that end please don't be afraid to be outspoken about amendments and addendums to these rules, as well as any we may have missed

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Is anybody here familiar with this thing?

I'm talking to a psychiatrist to get assessed for ADHD, but in order to start treatment, if necessary, I'll first have to do this neuropsychological assessment called the WEIS test. It's expensive as shit, more than 2k, but seems to be the only way for me to get any kind of treatment. I can either pay that amount or wait 8-10 months to get it through my health insurance.

I did some digging and apparently it's this assessment of intelligence that can only be applied by qualified professionals. It frankly sounds like I'm about to get my brainpan measured. Have any of you taken this exam? Is it as stupid as it sounds? Has it helped you receive and/or validate a diagnosis?

Honestly it fucking sucks to me, having to jump through all these hoops just to have somebody listen to me and say "you have/don't have ADHD".

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago (7 children)

If you don't mind me asking, did that have a substantial impact on how you felt afterwards? I'm asking because I suppose that what I hope to get from this test (when I eventually-god-knows-when do it) is some kind of change or potential thereof, you know? Something of substance, some kind of way out that I haven't tried over and over again before.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (4 children)

I know you didn't ask me about this but I think having a conceptual framework to understand that the struggles you have faced through your development and into your adulthood is generally pretty empowering because it's kinda like "Oh, I'm not failing - I'm just fundamentally at odds with the world/society".

It's super common to go through a period of grief for lost time, lost opportunities, and anger or frustration or disappointment in how all the people around you let you down by not figuring out all of the now patently-obvious signs of neurodivergence so yeah, if you get a diagnosis then you might want to brace for a bit of a grieving process.

In regards to potential for change there's a lot of stuff that can be done with regards to unmasking, which I kinda object to the absolutist framing of, or being much more conscious and selective in when you mask and how much you choose to mask. There's also a lot you can do about seeking small accomodations, especially in a social context - for example, if you meet me irl and I think you're worthy of being a friend or if I'm going to be working alongside you then I'm going to drop the fact that I'm autistic when it's relevant pretty early on these days because it's just a sort of heads-up to say "I'm going to miss social cues, I'm kinda odd, and I'll work a lot better with direct communication". It's not necessarily using excuses but if someone is saying something cryptic then I'm just gonna say something like "I am wayyy too autistic to understand what you're getting at here" (which is admittedly a problematic way of framing it but idk, I'm not about to drop some crash course monologue on what a spectrum disorder actually is in medical parlance so I'm just working with what I've got y'know?) before seeking clarification. It's a bit self-deprecating but it's also a way of giving people a better understanding of how I go about communicating and what my needs are, with the hope that I'll be able to train them in more direct communication with me over time.

With other accomodations there's stuff around embracing a need for security and stability, and actively cultivating that as a form of self-care. There's managing your "sensory diet" better so that you can avoid and mitigate noxious sensory stimuli while putting in conscious effort to seek out positive sensory stimuli, including allowing yourself to stim more freely or spending time (re)discovering your stims and actively cultivating habits to bring them into your daily life. That sort of thing.

Then there's probably a fair bit of personal work to do in regards to internalised ableism as well. Living as a neurodivergent adult that is late self-identifying, you don't go through that experience without picking up a fair share of internalised ableism.

There's other stuff that comes with being appropriately medicated for ADHD that I could go into but that's probably getting ahead of things a bit.

Ultimately there's a lot of small changes and accomodations that you can start working towards right now if you are so inclined - the worst thing that can happen is you shed a little internalised ableism, you become more connected to your sensory experience and you engage with it in a more positive and supportive way for yourself, and you make life just a bit nicer for yourself - it's hard to imagine these things could ever be negative outcomes for anyone, neurodivergent or not, diagnosed or not.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

I know you didn't ask me about this but I think having a conceptual framework to understand that the struggles you have faced through your development and into your adulthood is generally pretty empowering because it's kinda like "Oh, I'm not failing - I'm just fundamentally at odds with the world/society".

Yeah, and I absolutely struggle with this a lot. There's always a voice in my head saying "no, this is all bullshit, you're just like everybody else except you're weak and pathetic." I'm pretty sure I'm not the only person who's most likely ND who thinks this way to some extent. In fact I'm absolutely certain. It's a nasty thing to think, but we're surrounded by nastiness a lot of the time and it rubs off. It's the internalized ableism you mention, or at least a facet of it.

Edit: also, especially with ADHD, I think it's very likely that if I ever have an official diagnosis, people are still going to say that it's a fake condition made to sell medicine, and that all I need is to find something that I love to do and to get a productivity app or a planner or some shit, because "I forget things all the time too, it's normal." I don't even think people say this necessarily out of disrespect, some of them legitimately want to help but don't understand that I've tried all this stuff and none of it works for more than a couple days at best.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

There's always a voice in my head saying "no, this is all bullshit, you're just like everybody else except you're weak and pathetic."

Yeah I got diagnosed with ADHD recently and I think the diagnostic helped but I still get that voice sometimes...

I don't even think people say this necessarily out of disrespect, some of them legitimately want to help but don't understand that I've tried all this stuff and none of it works for more than a couple days at best.

This is exactly my experience (the couple days thing). So far meds really help me to be able to stick to these kinds of things

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Welcome to the club!

You might find it interesting to look into the concept that Dr William Dodson, one of the two biggest names in ADHD globally (edit: as in legitimate recognised specialists, not hucksters), has to say about ADHD & motivation.

He argues that ADHDers have a nervous system that responds completely differently to how a typical person does, and that ADHDers have an "interest-based nervous system" which is useful for understanding how to manage motivation and habit-formation and stuff like that in ADHDers.

Here's a blog post on this which is pretty succinct but you can also find Dr Dodson talking about it in podcasts and interviews if you want a deeper dive.

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