this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2024
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I'm struggling to figure out how to make friends without having Instagram or any other social media. I have discord but don't use it much. I see all my acquaintances in discord channels and sharing Instagram posts and stuff. It's already hard for me to make friends, but I feel like not having any of the traditional social media means I'm not included in any of that stuff.

Do you just accept that Instagram and shit are the way people interact and use it?

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (2 children)

What was the common thread from when you met the person? How did you hit it off with them?

So I've been married for 12 years, and we've been together since college, where we met. And my wife's basically the only person I interact with socially. And I think I'm straining my marriage by using her as my crutch. I've kind of relied on her for literally all of my socializing, like tagging along with her and her friends. But I've recently realized that that's not healthy and I need someone to talk and interact with independent of her. But it's really hard.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

I had a time where I had to make new friends in a new city, and what I learned is that you have to take initiative a lot in the beginning of a new friendship. You have to suggest something to do together maybe the first 2 - 4 times. After some time it should be more equal if not find some other friends.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

My husband complains of the same - that his only socialization is with my friends. Does your wife know you're lonely? I bet her friends' husbands are feeling it too

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

She does. But it's a little complicated. And that also leads to my question. I talk with a couple people through her, but I don't know how to continue to stay in touch, or how to just talk with them except to plan an activity or something.