this post was submitted on 27 Jul 2024
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Cultivate an aura of mystery. Make cryptic pronouncements. Wear a lot of black and imply furtively that you might be some kind of wizard.
With that out of the way, you can now explain all your social missteps as the work of unruly spirits that haunt your every step, barely contained by your constant etheric battle (this is why you get tired and irritable after 15 minutes of uninterrupted conversation).
This has worked for me for at least a decade. It also helps if you work with computers, since about 80% of the time you'll either be a) talking to equally socially busted people or b) able to safely change the subject at any time by relating any of your completely inscrutable work gripes to people with sensible jobs.
EDIT: Also, not for nothing, tarot is actually a really pleasant systematic way to think about your life and your problems in a way that's outside your body but still informed by your thoughts and feelings.