this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2024
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Not The Onion

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[–] [email protected] 143 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Turns out violent threats are not protected speech under the first amendment. Who knew?!

Fuck around and find out.

[–] [email protected] 65 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"Good people of the jury, my client is guilty of nothing more than merely forgetting to append 'in Minecraft,' to his statement."

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He specified using pliers. Are there pliers in Minecraft?

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago

I've been told there are mods for everything.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

They are if you're in Congress

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Oof. Sadly, events of the last few years support your statement. 🙄

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Up to 5 years to think about it.