this post was submitted on 03 Sep 2024
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I’m not talking about any “whole thing” I was only addressing specifically your way of seeing it as inappropriate the notion of your own daughter sitting on your lap for a photo at 14.
Is it odd? Yeah! It’s unusual because at that age most girls feel like it’s too childlike to sit on the lap of a father, so they would likely not want to. But that’s not what we’re talking about. You called it inappropriate. She’s your daughter; there’s nothing wrong with it inherently. You pointed to her pubescence as the reasoning; that’s really weird. Again - she’s your own child.
Maybe you really meant something a little different, like that it would be unusual because people often don’t want to be seen as so much younger than they are, but your referring to it as having an objectively amoral nature is not good.
And yes you sexualized her, that doesn’t mean anything to do with physical sexual maturity. In this context it means you viewed her with sexual desire attached. Most fathers see their own daughters as their babies, even into adulthood. We can’t help it; it’s called love. A father who sees his daughter in a sexual light, is in need of some help, for real.
Yeah, I left his comment alone because it was creepy, but him justifying not having a physically affectionate relationship with his own daughter because she's "pubescent" was very red flag to me.
Hopefully he's just being argumentative, otherwise I agree, he might benefit from talking with a therapist about this.