this post was submitted on 03 Nov 2024
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I have this argument with my wife often. I like to cook, and for me cooking is more than taking frozen meatballs and dumping them into a pan full of jar pasta sauce. I would rather make the sauce, maybe have some meatballs made in advance. My wife seems to think that pre-made stuff or mixes are the way to go. I would rather just make pancakes scratch, which isn't hard, where she would rather I just open the mix, add water, and make the food. But I do agree that having a frozen lasagna is better than taking the full effort when I just want to get dinner going. So where are your eat the pre-made vs make it from scratch?

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

NGL man, you're coming across as Defensive Internet Man on this. You two "argue frequently" about this, she "seems to think" mixes are the way to go when it sounds like it's really only pancake mix that's hanging you up and you know perfectly well why she likes pancake mix over scratch. She "tried to pull" nostalgia on you as if missing her deceased mother is a trick she's playing on you.

Amateur advice from someone with no special related experience: any time someone says they like a Thing because it reminds them of Close Dead Relative, maybe just take their word for it and let them be.

Edit: and apparently she's doing the grocery shopping. I'm starting to wonder who plans the menu throughout the week and how these disagreements are playing out from the spouse's perspective.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Yeah maybe she might be a little overreaching there? Forcing someone to always make (and eat) the thing you prefer is not a healthy relationship. Time to compromise.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

With OPs tendency to trickle in less flattering details only after 2-3 comments in, I'm skeptical she's "forcing" him to do anything. This is a one-sided perspective from someone intentionally devaluing his spouse's perspective.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

Might be. Still, recommending OP compromises with his partner.