this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2023
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Just perused a bunch of old letters - and I mean like, 20+ years, from when I was in high school. From friends that I no longer speak with. I distinctly remember the giddy feeling of getting mail back then. Found a learner's permit from someone that meant a HUGE amount to me, who gave me their Ls when they got their Ps.

I do have to wonder if they've kept my replies.

Or does it even matter? As fleeting as those moments were, they left a lasting impression on me. They shaped who I was to become. Maybe it's the same for them, maybe it's not.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Oh man you got me thinking about some of this stuff myself. Thank you. There's some good memories in there. As to the question, given you cant control other peoples reactions to stuff I guess its not even worth pondering. You can hope they do, but all that matters is how YOU feel about it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

True. There's no chance of recapturing that moment at all. Only some weird simulacra (which, if pulled off right would create its own moment). But gods! To go back to some of those exact moments. Even the painful ones that, so many years removed seem somewhat trivial yet the scars are still there.

What's interesting is that it's a box of stuff from before I was married, and yet I've still managed to add things over time from when my wife and I were together. Old student cards and metcards with notes written on them and cheap bracelets... So even if the box itself was a time capsule of a personal bygone era, there's been a time leak? It's kind of cool.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It absolutely is. I ended up digging through old photos looking for something the other day and it was... weird. A bitter sweet melancholy. Doing a lot of thinking like that these days. Everythings changed so much.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Bitter sweet melancholy is the perfect undertone for it - it's weird, huh? I often reminisce and it's a combination of longing, chances gone, friendships lost, friendships forged, love (and hate), and so much more. I wonder why we gravitate towards those types of memories so often. And yeah, I'm like you bud, been thinking a lot like that these days. Hence why I dug up the old nostalgia box.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I was at a mates kids birthday party over the weekend. Saw some old friends in a very different light. Walked away feeling a bit... i dunno, confused? I dont think they even are my mates any more. They were chatting away complaining and I'm sitting there thinking, 1 I cant relate, and 2, tbh I dont care! Like I wish I did, but I dont know you any more. You havnt asked how I'm doing, and now its all just... weird....

these are people I saw almost every weekend in my 20s. and now its.... odd.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I've been in those situations before - people you used to hang with and now you've drifted so far apart that they're... no longer friends but also not strangers? And yea, confused is definitely the vibe. A melancholic confusion - there's something that's lost, through no one's real fault, but it's nevertheless gone. What once was is no more.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

the thing that stuck me was I wasn't really sad. What struck me was there was this atmospheric shift and I was the only one who felt it.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I’ve got some high school stuff I’ve contemplated giving to the museum of failed relationships

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Lol - I know, right! But then I feel like you'd need both sides of the story. Having only the ones I received and not the ones I sent, it's a little hard to piece them together (especially when they're not dated). But yeah... the majority of the ones I've kept were from what I call my "big ex", when in reality we were only together for a short time, and it was a very one-sided relationship, and then I met my wife and we've been together for closing in on 20 years.

It was a time. That's all I guess I can put it down to hahah.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I had to downsize big time when I moved to Melbourne. I gave away many books that I still miss. I gave away a brand-new unopened PlayStation (first one) in its box.

Old correspondence like this did not survive.

I did it all again moving from Melbourne back to Perth, but that direction was far less painful. All the sentimental stuff was digital and still exists.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

OOof... I feel this to some extent. When I kicked myself out of home I didn't pack a whole lot. This stuff thankfully was from my late teens when I was already living on my own so I've been able to carry it around with me from share house to sharehouse. But some of the stuff I had left behind when I moved out? Not quite an unopened PSOne (holy hell that hurts to hear! I'm so sorry for your loss) but a bunch of really cool toys I wish I had kept.

And now, you're right - a lot of memories are kept digitally. I should digitise some of this stuff since if it ever went up in smoke that's it. There's no recovery for that.