this post was submitted on 23 Dec 2023
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Most of my adult friends are former co-workers. A couple were formerly my boss, and I've since even been a boss of one of them years after.
Your prior relationship was a working one with a superior and subordinate role. You see you relationship at an end because those circumstances are. You have a chance now to recast your relationship as peers. Your old boss may not be up for it, and thats fine, but if you value them let them tell you instead of deciding for them.
If you have a shared non-work topic (following sports or playing video games, etc), ask if they want to meet for lunch to talk about the non-work topic. Its okay, at lunch, if you end up talking shop about your industry, or even about your former share employer, but set the stage that your interest in talking to them has nothing to do with them being your former boss.
Yeah, he was my boss, and we always respected the roles, but after that much time it definitely grows into more than that. I literally started when his 3rd kid was being born and this next year would have been the year they went to college, which is crazy when I think of it that way. I know we will talk and keep in touch but it will be odd going from someone who has basically been part of my life and probably someone i interacted with more than my own parents to just an acquaintance.
I am not shy for making friends either. Most of the people in our area have now been there about 10 years now and luckily we are all like minded. Over the years I can confidently say 3 of them are solid friends and we hang out outside of work and even with each others groups of friends. It's just what I have done for most of my life and has proved to be a solid decision. The more the merrier is what I believe.