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Why do you think he's self-loathing?
He is a member of the proud boys which are homophobic.
If you’re a member of a group that hates the fact you’re gay and you are gay then it’s self loathing that’s driving that behaviour.
I've been stuck in a car with a family friend who's a gay conservative. He didn't come across as self loathing, that's an over simplification. This guy was incredibly self centered and unemphatic to anyone else. He didn't even trust his boyfriend to be telling the truth about not working in a porn store. Shared stories about his toxic childhood, but did so fondly. I got the impression that he thought "the other gays" just need to suck it up. He definitely loves himself and only himself.
Are they homophobic?
Are the Proud Boys homophobic?
Yes.
He's a gay proud boy... Why do you think he isn't?
Hate to break it to you, but a lot of gay pornstars are straight. It's just that gay porn pays more, for a man, than straight porn. It's known as Gay4Pay
I think there must be a large number of men who can't admit that they are bisexual or on the sexual spectrum. I see lots of commitment like this. "I am a heterosexual but i like dick" "I am Straight but..." If you like it enough for it to keep you hard, you are not completely straight. Of course that is fine, it is okay to say that gay4pay is gay or bi.
Some people just need time to come to terms with it. It's preferable if they don't join white supremacist groups while working that out, though.
It’s pretty standard to use medicine to keep hard during porn shoots. So I don’t think that proves anything.
I’m not saying your description matches no one but I think it’s equally plausible that some number of people just need the money or think that it will help them reach their dream of being in hetero porn.