this post was submitted on 26 Mar 2024
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I used to be like this, now idgaf. Take what you can get from your employer and don’t feel bad for a second.
They wouldn’t feel bad about underpaying, in fact they’d love to underpay you. They’ll also fire you without hesitation if it’s profitable to them.
That’s how the game is played, because it is a game to them. To any decently sized company you’re just a drop in the ocean, a disposable cog in the machine.
It isn't about feeling bad about them, it's about bad feelings about yourself. Low self-esteem, learned helplessness, expectations of bad outcomes, identification of bad traits in ourselves we know shouldn't come out at work, amongst others. This isn't even about the often referred to "Imposter Syndrome", though for some this is the truth, it's all about those expectations on ourselves and lack of appropriate communication by bosses and managers.
This is leadership at its most basic.
Ball up all the little insecurities we have at work and merge them with poor communication from people in authority, and you have an anxious and debilitating soup. Sprinkle in financial issues and general uncertainty about life and I think most of us just expect things to go wrong.
So yes, take what you can from an employer. Also try and take time where you can to give back to yourself.
This happened to my father. Dedicated his whole life to one company. Did crazy overtime. Was well liked by the entire staff and management. Received all kinds of accolades. He always wanted to be upper management and was told if he worked hard enough he'd get it. He's retiring in 3 years. He's never been given an upper management job. He goes in and does the bare minimum now.