this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2024
495 points (96.6% liked)

The Onion

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The Onion

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[–] [email protected] 53 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Takes off safety

Annoying tiktok voice: "You won't believe what happens next!"

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

I hate that I can say this out loud perfectly.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

shoots someone by accident

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no no no no no!"

[–] [email protected] 39 points 6 months ago

Ate the Onion for one whole second.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Imagine having to watch an ad before reloading

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

Or having to buy the ammo strictly through the tiktok shop

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

To reload please drink verification can

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Please solve the captcha before firing your next shot

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago

hilarious. kinda feels like it would work.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago

With the sniper rifles you hear the tok before the tik.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (2 children)

They joke, but it would likely work. Become a defense contractor and the US government will let you do anything

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

And they really do mean anything. They're even allowed to assassinate potential whistleblowers.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

But just "making rifles" doesn't make you a defense contractor without a contract to supply America's "defenses" with arms. And if they're made outside the US they'll be subject to import laws and could be blocked that way like Russian guns.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

This article title could legitimately make me "eat the onion" if I hadnt noticed the thread name its that good

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

They'd still be banned in Washington State as of January 2024.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Holosun moment

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Does the sound alternate for each round

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

I can see this happening...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

That headline slays like a lonely white guy in a grade school